


Wasteland

by gooey_world



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man - Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bisexual Peter Parker, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Multi, Nonbinary Character, Nonbinary Wade Wilson, Other, Pansexual Wade Wilson, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Sensory Overload, Wade Wilson Breaking the Fourth Wall
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-30
Updated: 2018-09-07
Packaged: 2019-05-16 04:42:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 30
Words: 32,602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14804573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gooey_world/pseuds/gooey_world
Summary: After Infinity War, the lost heroes end up in a wasteland. Is it Heaven? Hell? The Soul Stone? The author might not even know. Tensions run high, especially with the unexpected visitor: Deadpool. But Spider-Man might not mind the quirky, genderless, merc-with-a-mouth.*Chapters vary in length, rated M for drugs, language, & eventual sexy times*





	1. Chapter One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter wakes to the Wasteland and is comforted by an unexpected friend.
> 
> Two minutes after the disintegration.

“Ohhh... ow... God...” Peter moaned, waking up from his unconscious state. “My head...” His head hurt like hell. His body felt like it had gone through a slaughterhouse. Spider-Man’s vision was clouded and swarmed with floating, black spots. He vomited onto the sandy ground, and then rolled over on his back to get away from the bile. 

The pain was fading fast, though, and his senses were beginning to come back. His eyes cleared, and he looked around to see an utter wasteland— with his friends all writhing in pain on the ground, too. The ringing in his ears stopped, and he could hear their collective struggle to get up. Other than that, the place was deathly quiet, with no wind at all. 

Peter managed to find his balance, and groggily stood up. His legs were weak, like they hadn’t been used in years. 

Everything came back. The memories, the pain, the guilt at leaving Tony, the fear of death, the grief. Spider-Man doubled over in pain again, but this time it was emotional. 

At least he wasn’t alone. The other heroes —he could make out T’challa and Starlord, and was that Bucky?— were in the same pain he was in. Wanda was sobbing with Mantis and Groot, and Starlord looked like he was having a panic attack. Hell, Nick Fury looked rattled. 

Only Dr. Strange seemed calm, really. He was doing some kind of magic, with that weird, sparking, glowing... power. 

And then, in this place of misery, and grief, and utter loss and heartbreak, Peter turned toward a sound he would never have dreamed to have heard. 

“Oh! I have all my fingers, the knife goes chop! Chop! Chop! I have all my toes, too, I’m here, I’m queer, and there’s nothing you can do about it!” The sing-song voice came from the manic, infamous Deadpool, who was currently skipping around with their katanas in their hands, sweeping them through the air. 

Everyone stared. 

“All the single ladies! All the single ladies! All the-“ 

“Deadpool.” Fury was, well, furious. “What on Earth-“ 

“Oh, but you see, babe, we’re not on Earth anymore! We’re all dead!” Deadpool laughed manically before he continued. “You all are moping around like a bunch of-“ 

“Who is this man?” T’challa asked. 

“Not a man, but I don't blame ya! It's they/them, for future reference. Anyway. You should be celebrating! I’m finally dead! Shut up, Yellow, I know! We’re dead!” Deadpool kept singing and laughing happily, and the heroes shared worried and annoyed glances, except for Peter Quill, who was still having that panic attack. 

“Can we all agree to ignore Deadpool?” Fury said, clearly annoyed. The heroes nodded in agreement. 

Peter didn’t agree to ignore Deadpool. Spider-Man had only met the anti-hero a few times before, but they had been nice enough, although very sexual and Peter doubted that ‘Pool could take anything seriously in their life. 

As if they had read Spidey’s mind, the anti-hero sat next to Peter on the ground. 

“Ignore me?” They groaned. “But I need constant attention, isn’t that right, Spidey-poo?” 

“I never said I was ignoring you, ‘Pool.” The Spider said quietly. 

“Good thing! ‘Cause you’re the only one that ever gets my pronouns right. And you’ve got a cute ass!” 

Peter was very glad that his mask was covering his flushed face. 

“So, Bug, are we in heaven?” 

Peter had never actually considered the possibility. After a moment of thought, he said slowly,

“No, I don’t think so. I think we’re trapped inside the soul stone, actually.” 

“Does that mean we’re not actually dead?” The anti-hero pouted. 

Spider-Man grimaced. “Sorry to burst your bubble, Deadpool.” 

The mercenary didn’t seem to be too disheartened. “Aww... it’s okay, Itsy-Bitsy! You’re here, so me and White and Yellow are all good! Shut up, White!” 

“What are they saying?” Peter was blushing again. 

The merc tsked. “Can’t tell ya that, Sweetums. Not yet anyway.” 

The few moments of silence were enough for Peter to feel the weight of everything again. Deadpool had been distracting him really well... 

“Deadpool?” Spider-Man asked softly. 

“Call me Wade, Baby Boy, if you want.” 

“Wade... are-are we gonna be okay? I-I don’t wanna die-“

For once, Deadpool didn’t respond verbally, at least at first. The merc wrapped his strong arms around the Spider, pulling him into a hug. Peter sobbed, it was all so overwhelming, but Wade was here, all around him; Wade felt warm, and big, and safe... 

“Baby, I don’t know,” they murmured. “I wish I did, I wish I could tell you. But we’ll try our very hardest to get outta here, ain’t that right, Little Spider?” 

Peter nodded. It was so nice that Wade gave it to him straight. He could handle it, and they knew that, and it wasn’t some lie you would tell a child. The two of them sat like that for a minute or two, before they heard arguing coming from the groups that were beginning to form. 

“I will not let you take control, Strange; what experience do you have as a leader?” Nick Fury barked. 

“Listen to me, Fury,” Strange was deadly calm. “You speak of experience; what experience do you have with the stones? We both know I’m our best chance at getting out of here alive.” 

“We have so little chance, it doesn’t matter!” Fury argued back. 

“Fury! You have no idea what you’re up against-“

“You think I haven’t heard that one before, Strange?” The two stared at each other, eyes narrowed. Peter’s eyes widened when he saw Fury’s hand on his gun. T’challa saw it too. 

“Mr. Fury, you’re a good man,” the Black Panther said quietly. “We cannot allow this to tear us apart. We must focus on the real problem at hand.” 

“I don’t care who’s in charge. I just want to destroy Thanos.” Drax supplied unhelpfully. “I must avenge the deaths of my-“ 

“Who’s this guy?” Fury asked with a quirked eyebrow. 

“I am Drax the Destroyer, I have come to avenge the deaths of my wife and-“ 

“Okay, well Drax the Destroyer needs to take a seat.” Fury mumbled. 

“There are no seats to take?” Drax questioned. 

“I am Groot.” Said Groot.

“Can anyone speak Groot?” Maria Hill asked. 

“I can.” T’challa said. “I know more than twenty languages, Groot isn’t a difficult one.” Everyone stared. “He said: Drax takes everything literally.” T’challa continued. “I agree with Drax. I believe we should have no official leader. We must not be divided in our cause.” 

“Aren’t they just hysterical?” Wade giggled in Peter’s ear. “Cuties.”


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Dr. Strange teaches Peter how to meditate and then treats him like a child.
> 
> Three hours after the disintegration.

A group was beginning to form. Order was returning. 

Mantis began relaxing people who were distressed. She put Starlord to sleep and calmed Wanda so that she was in a sort of trance-like state. She even came around to Peter (apparently his outburst earlier was known to those outside of Wade) and asked if he wanted to be calmed, but he shook his head vehemently. No mind control today. 

Maria Hill, a SHIELD agent who stuck close to Nick Fury, had some basic first aid training. Her and T’challa began patching up people’s wounds. 

Dr. Strange assumed a sort of happy medium between leader and led by teaching heroes how to meditate. Deadpool was very enthusiastic about that and begged Peter to join them. 

“Look, Spidey, please please please IjustknowitwillhelpyouandI’vealwayswantedtotry!” Peter pressed his hands over his ears. Wade was practically screaming. 

“Please... my Spidey-sense is too overwhelmed with you yell like that...” Peter groaned from all the noise so close to his ears. 

“Oh!” Wade said, much quieter. “I had a friend who got sensory overload, too. I’m sorry, Baby Boy, won’t happen again, scout’s honor.” 

The pair then learned how to meditate, but Peter wondered how much of it was for Wade’s sake, really, because the anti-hero squirmed the whole time. Spider-Man blushed and smiled with the realization that it hadn’t been for Wade’s benefit, at all. Deadpool had done it for him. 

And it did help, weirdly enough. Spidey could be content for a little while with thinking about nothing at all. That was better than thinking about everything bad that had happened in the past few hours. That was a gift within itself, thought Peter, and made a mental note to thank Dr. Strange eventually. 

Peter was tracing his finger through the orange-tinted sand of the wasteland when the low mutters of conversation stopped. Something had changed, and he and ‘Pool looked up to see none other than Vision walking towards them. 

“Spider-Babe,” Deadpool whispered. “Am I hallucinatin’ again, or is Vision walking towards us right now?” 

Spider-Man didn’t really like how Wade said again, but he let it slide. “You’re not hallucinating. That really is Vision.” 

“What the fuck?” Wade mumbled, just as Wanda broke from her trance and ran to meet Vision, sobbing into his arms. The cyborg wept, too, which was something that Peter had previously thought could not happen. Vision wiped Wanda’s tears and kissed her, and whispered something in her ear. Peter’s heart fluttered at the display of affection and real love. He was such a romantic. 

“Wade, let’s see what Vision has to say, yeah?” The hero pulled Deadpool along to the inner circle of everyone, and after Vision calmed, they all listened expectantly. 

“I apologize, I don’t- I don’t know what happened.” Vision was still clearly perplexed. Peter noticed that there was no yellow stone on his forehead. “I was dead- but now- I apologize.” 

Wanda was gripping his hand tightly, and her head rested on his shoulder. Tears still flowed from her eyes. 

“My only guess is that the stone chose me to be here.” 

Silence, except for Wanda’s sniffing. 

Vision continued. “Why is it only you here? Why are there only heroes here? Why not any regular people?” 

More silence. Peter had never considered that.

“It’s probably the author not wanting to deal with all the normal people. Y’know, make this a ‘hero only’ fic. More exciting that way.” Deadpool mumbled. 

“What is he going on about?” Fury asked. 

“It’s they/them, bitch!” Deadpool shouted. 

“Wade,” Peter’s voice shook a little. “What are you talking about?” 

“Peter, let us handle this.” Dr. Strange said, a little too gently. Peter’s face fell. They were all treating him like a kid again...

“You’re bullying him,” Wade said firmly. 

“We’re trying to keep him safe from murderers like you.” Maria Hill’s comment bit into Peter. 

“Oh, like you’ve never killed anyone before? Leave us alone. C’mon, Spider-Man.” Wade held out his hand to help Peter get up, and Peter wouldn’t let go of him after that. 

It was getting dark, but with the lingering light, Wade could see the wet spots under the eyes of Spidey’s mask. 

“Oh, baby, baby, are you crying? It’s okay, shhh...” Peter took off his mask, and Wade tried not to stare at his beautiful, distressed face. 

"Wade," he said, his voice small. "I'm okay." 

"I know you are, beautiful, I know, you're so much better than okay. You're not a kid in my eyes, okay Spidey? You're strong, you're so strong. Fuck all of them. They think they're so goddamn high and mighty, that they can just treat you like a child when you were just trying to help!" 

Peter could feel the fury rolling off the merc in waves. Tears pricked at his eyes again, but this time because of the way Wade was acting; they really cared, they were really trying, and that's more than what he could say about the Avengers. 

Peter looked up at Wade. They were so tall, towering over the boy at nearly 6'3". Spider-Man stepped closer to the anti-hero and took both of their hands in his own. 

"Wade... Thank you. You're so-you're so good at this."

Wade was blushing under their own mask, this time. Peter took a deep breath, and said,

"My name is Peter Parker. Strange mentioned it earlier. I would've rather told you myself, but... This'll have to do." Wade's mask stretched with their smile. 

"Petey, I'm Wade Wilson, A.K.A Deadpool, A.K.A the Merc with a Mouth. But you can call me Daddy." Deadpool winked, the mask moving to match their facial expression. 

"No! God, no, eww, Wade!" It's too bad Peter's mask was off now, he thought, because Wade could surely see the flush that had spread across Peter's face. 

After that(very awkward) moment passed, Peter asked, 

"Wade, will you take off your mask? I can never tell what you're thinking." 

Wade reacted instantly, releasing Peter's hands and scratching the back of their neck. They were suddenly fidgety and jumpy, and the emotions Peter was reading from Wade were all anxiety. 

"Well, you see, honey, that's not a good idea, because imagine the worst face you've ever seen, yeah? And then hit it with a flamethrower. A fucking flamethrower. And then bulldoze it. Exfoliating doesn't work, sweetie, dermatologists hate me-" 

"Woah, 'Pool, I think that's enough self-deprecation for one day. You don't have to take it off, but I'm sure it's not half as bad as what you're saying." Spidey reasoned. 

"Maybe another time," Deadpool mumbled. Peter decided not to push the issue, and ended with a simple "okay." 

The yelling began again from the other side of the group. 

“We will surely not survive if we stay here,” came T’challa’s reason. “There is no water and no food here. We must go-“ 

“I’m not sure that you’re right. I haven’t felt hungry or thirsty since I’ve come here.” Strange said calmly. Everyone was quiet for a moment. 

“Still,” T’challa replied. “I am not one to wait around here any longer. I say we leave tomorrow to wander this wasteland.” 

“I am Groot.” Said Groot. 

“He said that he does not know the rules of time and space here, but he hopes to understand them more fully by exploring.” T’challa translated. 

“Cat-Boy got all of that out of ‘I am Groot’? There’s no way he’s really translating.” Wade hissed in Peter’s ear. 

Spider-Man wished the sun was up so that he could see everyone’s body language more clearly. The arguments died down a bit after that, with only terse whispers that even Peter’s Spidey hearing couldn’t make out. 

“Wade, can we sleep?” Asked Peter softly. Wade chuckled. 

“You don’t have to ask for permission, Baby Boy. Of course, we can.” 

Deadpool let Peter use their arm as a pillow, and Spidey stuck close to their side for warmth. Without the hot sun, deserts got cold at night, but the mercenary always seemed warm to the touch.


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter wakes up, thinks, and then goes back to sleep.
> 
> One day after the disintegration.

Peter was the first one awake out of the entire group of heroes. He woke slowly, groggily, with the morning light kissing his face. It was only then that he realized there was no sun, just a blanket of light in the morning. 

Spider-Man also wasn’t hungry, but his wounds didn’t seem to be healing, either. It was a strange state of limbo, he realized, and there didn’t seem to be a way out. 

He glanced over at Deadpool, who was snoring softly, still in their leather suit. The changing dynamic of the group was stressful, and the grief still clung to his back, stubbornly, but at least Peter could trust the anti-hero. 

Woah, where did that thought come from? Spider-Man shook his head, confused. It wasn’t like he couldn’t trust T’challa, or Bucky, or Dr. Strange, even if they did speak so condescendingly to him sometimes, and they didn’t seem to care if he was okay... 

Peter supposed it was only logical that he latched onto Wade so easily. Logical. 

Spider-Man looked back at the sleeping mercenary. They were leaned in towards Peter, and their chest rose and fell, the sight calming Peter again. He sighed and buried his head in the anti-hero’s chest. His eyes fluttered shut, and he was asleep.


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter breaks Wade's jaw and then leaves with them.
> 
> One day, one hour after the disintegration.

Something grabbed Spider-Man. 

Peter’s eyes flew open, panicked. He threw a punch at the figure hovering over him, his heart racing. 

“ ‘aby ‘oy, I thin’ ya bro’ my jaw!” ‘Pool laughed, startled. The mercenary shoved their jaw back into place with a gruesome crunch of bone on bone. 

“Oh my gosh, Wade, I’m so sorry! I didn’t-“ 

“Don’t worry ‘bout it, Sweets. I startled you,” Wade was still laughing. Spidey sighed in relief. “Look, Cat-Boy is leaving. I woke ya in case you wanted to go with them.” 

Peter rubbed his eyes and saw the group leaving. T’challa, Wanda, Vision, Drax, and Groot were all walking into the horizon. Spidey shook his head. 

“Let’s stay here. They’re not gonna find anything.” 

“You got it, babe.” Deadpool winked, and Peter blushed. Wade absentmindedly ran a gloved hand through the Spider’s curls and started singing. 

“Big wheels keep on turning, carry me home to my kin, singin’ songs about the south-land...” Wade sang softly at first but then got louder as he got closer to the chorus. 

“Well, I hope Neil Young will remember, a southern man don’t...” Peter smiled at Wade, soaking in the moment. 

They sang the chorus together, loudly. “Sweet home Alabama!” Wade added in a guitar riff that sounded nothing like a guitar. “Where the skies are so blue! Sweet home Alabama!” Peter knew he was off-key, but Wade didn’t mind. “I’m comin’ home to you!” 

Strange glared daggers at them— apparently he had been trying to meditate. Peter blushed and stopped singing, but Wade sang even louder, directing their voice away from Spidey’s ears so that the boy wouldn’t get sensory overload again. 

“Now Watergate doesn’t bother me! Does your conscience bother you, tell me the truth!” Wade belted out happily. Spider-Man was anxious as Strange began striding quickly over to the two of them. His red cape looked menacing. 

Strange went right up to Deadpool and stared at them. Dr. Strange was tall, but Wade still had to look down a bit to see him properly. Of course, the merc ignored him and kept singing. 

“Sweet home, Alabama! De-now-now-nah-nah-now! I’m comin’ home to you!” They pointed right at the incredibly irritated Strange. 

“Deadpool, if you’d please-“ 

“Sweet home-“ 

“Deadpool!” 

“-Alabama! I’m- agh- ow!” Strange broke Deadpool’s arm. 

Peter gasped. It had all happened in an instant, but there were those conjured, sparking ropes that Dr. Strange makes, and they had wrapped tight around ‘Pool’s arm and yanked. A sickening crack filled the air, and Deadpool stared at him for a moment. 

Then, the mercenary flew through the air, executing a spinning kick aimed at the man’s side. Strange barely dodged the kick, and now Fury was running over, and Peter panicked because oh my God, now people he looked up to were fighting each other. 

“Please! Stop fighting!” Spider-Man cried out helplessly, and he tried to web Strange’s arm even though he knew he should save fluid. Strange deflected the blow, and now Fury was coming towards him, guns raised. 

“Spider-Man, stop fighting for him, he’s a murderer.” Fury’s deep voice grated against Peter, scraping against his ears. 

“You’re the one pointing guns at me!” Peter yelled as he leaped out of the way of the barrels and towards the bigger fight between the merc and the magician. 

“Wade, stop!” Peter cried out again, just as Deadpool was about to land a punch. Surprisingly, they did stop, mid-punch, and stared at the Spider. Strange took the opportunity to throw them on the ground with some invisible force. 

‘Pool rolled over and up, and suddenly the merc was standing in front of Spider-Man, guns pointed at Strange and Fury. 

Deadpool was breathing hard, and they glanced for a second to check on Peter, but then kept their eyes on their targets. Bucky, Mantis, Maria Hill, and Starlord were all there, too. Maria stood by Fury, but Bucky went over Peter and Wade. 

“Deadpool,” Bucky said lowly. “Strange shouldn’t have done that, but you need to put the guns down.”

Wade’s smile stretched his mask. “Oh, of course, Cyborg-Arm! But only when Cap’n Jack Sparrow over there puts his away, too. Seriously, what is with the eyepatch?” 

“Guys, I’d rather not have us kill each other...” Peter Quill’s voice came scratchy after the day of being quiet from his emotional turmoil. 

Fury put his guns away reluctantly, and Wade did the same. 

“As promised.” Deadpool winked. 

“Listen, Deadpool,” Fury snarled. “You-“ 

“Tsk, tsk, tsk, threatening me again? That’s dumb of you!” 

“Goddamnit ‘Pool! I want you out of here, understand? Leave our little group. Now.” Fury was angrier than Peter had ever seen him, and Spider-Man couldn’t help but be intimidated. Wade didn’t seem to be bothered. 

“I’d love nothing more, cock-face!” Deadpool spat. “Wanna come, Petey?” 

Peter froze. He started hyperventilating. 

Spider-Man didn’t deal with these sorts of things. Spider-Man webbed up bad guys, all cut and dry. No maybe’s about it. Spider-Man’s job was easy because right and wrong were so clearly defined. 

But this was a gray area. And Spider-Man started panicking. 

“Spidey, you okay?” Wade said, concerned. “Woah, relax, babe, take a breath. Breathe with me. In, out. In, out. In, out.” Peter breathed. “Better?” Wade asked. Peter nodded. 

“Focus on tangible things, Baby Boy. What can you feel? What can you see? What can you smell?” Wade whispered into Peter’s ear. Spider-Man relaxed, finally. 

“Peter, don’t go with him,” Fury said gently. “Remember who he is, he’s a killer, Peter.” 

“Goddamn it, fuckers, it’s they/them! I’ll even use it in a sentence, listen: Peter, don’t go with them. Remember who they are. They’re a killer. See? Not hard!” Deadpool was frustrated. Spidey grabbed their hand, and they seemed to instantly relax. 

“You’re all killers,” Peter’s stomach hurt. “I’m a killer. I’ve killed people by accident. Many of you have killed on purpose. At least Wade is open about it. They’re not a hypocrite. But you all are.” Spider-Man looked up at Wade, his mask off, and his face vulnerable, and said, “I’d much rather be with you than a bunch of hypocrites.” 

Deadpool’s mask’s eyes widened comically. “W-w- Ahem. Well, you heard the man. We’re out.” They squeezed the boy’s hand reassuringly, and the pair walked away, into the horizon.


	5. Chapter Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter and Wade hold hands and talk about drugs and the Wasteland.
> 
> One day, three hours after the disintegration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mentions of drugs & alcohol.

Peter was still holding Wade’s hand, and he had to admit it felt pretty nice. So he had to distract himself. 

“Vision had good questions, Wade,” Spider-Man said, thoughtful. “Why do you think it’s only us heroes?” 

Deadpool laughed. “It’s cute that you think I’m a hero, love.” 

Peter sighed. “You know what I mean, ‘Pool.” 

“Yeah, yeah sorry, babe,” the mercenary smiled sheepishly. “I dunno, I guess Vision’s guess that the stone ‘chose him’ would apply to us, too, right? Like if the stone could choose things, that means it’s probs alive, right? Maybe it doesn’t like scrotum-chin. I sure wouldn’t.” 

Peter stared at Wade in awe, ignoring how they called Thanos a penis. “Wade, you’re a genius! That makes perfect sense.” 

“Aww, thanks, Petey-Pie. I don’t get that particular compliment very often. Sexiest person alive? Hundreds of times. Hilariously witty? Constantly-“ 

“Wade.” 

“Sorry kiddo. Got carried away.” The merc winked, maybe for the third time today. 

“It’s okay, I just... that implies that the soul stone thinks it’s only chance is to put us together and form...” Peter’s eyes went wide. 

“Fuck no! There’s no way I’m going all Avengers with those clowns.” Deadpool protested. Spider-Man didn’t disagree. Everyone had been pretty miserable to each other in this past day, and that’s low for a bunch of heroes. 

“Shut the fuck up!” Deadpool yelled out, suddenly. They were grabbing their head like they had a splitting headache. Peter touched their arm, concerned. “God, they won’t shut up! This is my fucking head!” Wade was angry. 

Peter pulled them down to sit on the sandy ground. “What are they saying?” He whispered as if any small noise would bother the merc. 

Deadpool groaned. “Yellow keeps telling me to do what you said, to team up with everyone and fight our way out. White wants to die, so they keep saying to kill everyone. If only so we can die here, in this wasteland.” They turned to Peter. “I hate them.” 

Spider-Man didn’t know how to respond, so he just hugged Wade tightly. Deadpool sniffed. 

“Why doesn’t anyone ever get my pronouns right?” Wade asked, their voice soft. Peter was alarmed at the lack of pet names and dick jokes, and he knew that the mercenary was serious. 

Spider-Man frowned. “I think it’s because they see it as inconvenient. And they don’t seem to like you.” Peter pulled away from the hug to see Wade’s expression, and he wished they weren’t wearing their mask. 

“Should we try and catch up to Black Panther and the others?” Peter wondered after Wade calmed down. 

“Yeah, babe, sounds like a plan,” Deadpool’s voice was normal again. “Can I hold your hand?” 

Peter blushed. “Uh... y-yeah. Sure! I mean, if you want.” Spider-Man cursed himself for being so goddamn awkward. Wade’s smile was huge; even under the mask, it was very apparent. But the pair walked in comfortable silence. 

“You also present as pretty masculine,” Peter said out of nowhere. 

“Huh?” 

“For why they never get your pronouns right. It shouldn’t matter, but it does to most people.” 

Wade laughed. “Oh, honey,” they said, only half kidding. “You should see me in a dress.” 

Spider-Man forced himself to breathe. He did not need to think about that right now, nope, not even a little bit. Those feelings could be confronted later. Stop thinking. Stop. 

“I’d kill for some booze, Sweets,” Wade was rambling. “Some vodka. What are you like drunk? You’re probably real cute. I bet you’d cuddle and be all giggly and shit. Have you ever-“ 

“I don’t drink.” Peter said simply and waited for ‘Pool to say something condescending. 

“That’s cool. It’s shitty stuff, really.” Wade yawned. 

Peter grinned. Usually, people would call him a prude, or a loser, or uptight. Or even ask why in that awful tone. This was a nice change. 

“Do you smoke, love?” Wade looked at him curiously. “Only askin’ ‘cause I might have an emergency stash somewhere.” 

“No.” 

“Do y’mind if I smoke tonight? I’d like to get some shit off my chest for once.” 

“Uh... I guess I don’t mind. Is it... is it just weed?” Peter got nervous, not wanted to feel stupid in front of Wade. 

“Of course, Baby Boy!” Wade laughed a little, but not in a condescending way. “ ‘m not a crackhead anymore, don’t worry.” 

Peter couldn’t stop himself. “Anymore?” 

“Yeah...” Deadpool kicked at the sand a little as they were walking. “That was bad. If you’re planning on starting something, babe, don’t start coke. It’s bad.” Spidey sensed that the merc didn’t want to talk about it anymore, so he let the topic go. The silence was comfortable, though, and they walked, hand in hand, staring into the distance.


	6. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Wade gets stoned and calls Peter an angel.
> 
> One day, ten hours after the disintegration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Marijuana.

"It's getting dark, Little Spider." Wade squeezed his hand. "Wanna stop for the night?"

Peter yawned. He was so tired. "Yeah... let's stop."

They both sat on the ground and Peter ran his fingers through the sand.

"Baby Boy," The merc said. "Are you still okay if I smoke?" Spider-Man nodded.

Deadpool unzipped a pocket of their suit and pulled out a glass pipe and a bag of weed. They filled the bowl with precision and experience and lit the dried leaves with a pocket lighter. Wade pushed their mask up and took a deep pull on the pipe. Peter watched the smoke rise into the perfectly still air, and he saw the scarred lips sigh happily.

'Pool grimaced when they saw the Spider watching them.

"Sorry, Spidey," they said quietly.

"Why are you sorry?" Peter said, confused.

"Ah... Baby... you don't have to look at my face... I know what it looks like. I know it-" Deadpool said softly, looking away from Peter. "I know it's bad."

Spider-Man felt their pain, their embarrassment. He touched Wade's back, gently and carefully, and felt the mercenary relax under his touch.

"It's not. It's not bad at all, Wade, I wouldn't lie to you." Deadpool looked back at him, biting their lip. Spider-Man felt a deep pull to do something, but he wasn't sure what it was exactly. He decided to be brave.

"C-can I... um..." Peter blushed, horribly.

"What do you need, love?" Wade's voice was low and soft again, but Peter couldn't speak. He signed instead.

_Do you know ASL?_

Wade gasped, happily, and smiled wide. _Of course, I do, Baby. Having trouble speaking?_ They signed.

 _Yeah. Can I sit on your lap?_ Peter was blushing horribly again. _I'm sorry, I mean if you want._

Wade froze. "A-are you serious?" They spoke out loud.

Peter swallowed hard and nodded. He looked at the ground.

 _I'm sorry,_ he signed again. _Forget about it._ Peter wiped a tear quickly away, trying to get a hold of himself.

"No! No, Baby, of course you can! I'm so stupid. I just never thought- God, I'm sorry, honey, c'mere. Can I touch your waist?"

Peter nodded, sniffing. The mercenary held his waist and sat the boy on their lap gently. Deadpool wrapped their arms around him, humming quietly.

 _Thank you_ , Peter signed. _Your skin doesn't bother me, I promise._

Spider-Man felt Wade take a deep breath, and then their hands went from his waist to take off their mask. The mask was thrown a few feet out of the way, and Peter nuzzled his head further into the mercenary's chest. Their hands returned to his waist.

"I'm gonna take another drag, okay love?" Wade's voice was low but sturdy, and Peter could feel it rumble through him now that he was so close. Spider-Man nodded.

Weed didn't smell too bad, Peter realized. It smelled earthy and rough, but he didn't mind.

"What does it feel like?" He whispered, not wanting to ruin the moment.

"Hmm..." Wade thought for a moment. "It feels... floaty. It feels light and curious."

"That was very profound."

"You think so?" They grinned, their teeth flashing in the dark. "I'm flattered, Baby Boy."

After a third, fourth, and fifth drag, the mercenary was rambling on about God and the universe, or something, because their train of thought didn't make much sense to Peter.

"So, like, anyway, that's why I think God is dead. But if they aren't, boy am I in trouble. No lightning? I love storms, babe. I love them a lot. They're so... rainy. And wet. Very wet. I'd like to make you wet. Ah, fuck. I wish it would rain. I'm dizzy. Are you-"

"You'd like to make me -what?" Spider-Man turned to see a sleepy Deadpool.

"Mm, sorry. Didn't mean to say that. You know, when you asked to sit on my lap, I was so happy. Because y'know, consent is so important. I'll always ask before I do something, got it? Consent, babe. Good stuff. Consent. But you probably don't have to ask before you do stuff. I'm like, sixty percent kinky. And there's no way you're that kinky. You're like a thirty-five at most-"

"What?" Peter was blushing way too much.

"Mm, I want another hit." Wade grabbed their bowl and lit it again, taking a long, slow drag. The smoke spiraled out of their nose. "That's better."

"Why do you think I'm not kinky?" Spidey couldn't stop himself.

"I dunno. You're too cute for all that shit. But woah, it would be like, super hot if you turned out kinky. So unexpected. Goddamn. Am I making you uncomfortable? Sorry, Spid-"

"No, no, it's okay."

Wade yawned. "Shit, I'm fuckin' tired, angel. Let's sleep, yeah? Ha, angel's a good name for you. 'S nice." The stoned mercenary was asleep and snoring the second their head was on the sand, so Peter snuggled up next to them, feeling their warmth. His eyes closed, and he was asleep.


	7. Chapter Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Drax thinks that Peter and Wade are fucking, Peter worries, and Wanda makes a lot of sense.
> 
> Two days, four hours after the disintegration.

Peter was getting tired of walking.

They had started out early that morning, and sure, 'Pool was nice to talk to, and cuddle with at night, but the fact was that putting one foot in front of the other was monotonous, especially when he was watching the sand to follow the undisturbed footprints. A windless wasteland had its benefits, at times.

Both Spider-Man and Deadpool were elated when they saw the distant figures resting on the horizon.

"Angel, lemme give you a ride! Let's run to them!" The merc had taken to calling Peter that after being stoned, and Spider-Man wasn't complaining.

"Okay!" Peter hopped onto the anti-hero's back, looping his arms over their shoulders. Their strong arms kept his legs from slipping, and the mercenary began sprinting towards the group ahead of them. Deadpool let out a joyous yell as the pair barreled to the group, and they skidded to a stop right in front of Groot.

"I am Groot!" Yelled Groot.

"He says you frightened him. Welcome, Deadpool, Spider-Man. What brings you here?" T'challa asked.

"Fury kicked me out," the merc said, their smirk visible through their mask. "And Spidey was dumb enough to come with me!" They smiled proudly.

"Fury was a real jerk," Peter supplied. "He drew his guns on us, and then told me to leave Wade alone because they kill people."

"The stress must be taking its toll on him," Vision said sympathetically. "But that is no excuse for the actions you described. You were right to leave, Peter." The cyborg looked at the pair levelly. Spider-Man smiled, relieved.

"How are the others?" Wanda said. She looked much better than before, confidently holding Vision's hand.

"Strange is worried, too, but he won't admit it," Peter slid off of Wade's back and stood next to them. "Starlord is getting back on his feet a bit, and Bucky and Mantis are just quiet. There's still so much grief."

"And Maria Hill is a jerk, too," Wade added unhelpfully. "Fury was worse, of course, but yikes, girl." Wanda snickered, but Vision's mouth was set in a line.

"How are you two feeling?" T'challa asked gently.

Peter responded with "I've been better," at the same time that Wade said "Just dandy, Cat-Boy!" T'challa grinned, and even Vision had to crack a smile.

"Making love always diffused the tension for my wife and I," Drax said casually. "Have you-"

"No, actually, it's not like that!" Squeaked Peter, who was blushing furiously. He glanced up at Wade, whose grin was huge.

"Well, I don't know about that, Babe-" they teased.

"Wade!" Peter was about to die of embarrassment.

"Maybe some lovemaking would-"

"I don't want to talk to you right now!" Spider-Man's voice was ten octaves too high, and he left quickly to go clear his head. Everyone was laughing, now, except Drax, who apparently didn't understand any basic humor or sarcasm.

He walked away from them all until he couldn't hear their voices, but so that he could still see the figures. Maybe it was time to get these feelings sorted out. His face felt hot, and even though he wasn't thirsty, he wished he had water.

Peter sat in the warm sand and began piling it in a big mound. Or, he thought, he could just keep the confusing feelings bottled up until they burst. That seemed like the more attractive option, at least for now.

Spider-Man punched the sand and made a significant dent. He pulled his mask out of a pocket and put it on for the first time in two days. Maybe he should keep his guard up with Wade, just for a little while. Peter let the sand run through his fingers, trickling onto his lap. Who knows what Wade felt about him? Were they really just friends? Could they be anything more? Did Peter want that? He didn't know.

A few things were holding Spidey back from really liking Wade. They killed people, for one. And although Peter had said earlier that it didn't matter, he knew he was lying. The thought of Deadpool actually shooting someone, or using their katanas was horrifying. And they killed for money. It was an ethical dilemma, really.

The second thing was the scars. It wasn't that Spider-Man minded them, per say, he just hadn't seen them, except for on Wade's chin. The mercenary was incredibly self-conscious about them, and Peter couldn't help but fear the worst. What if the ones on their chin were smoother than the others? What if Wade never wanted to change in front of him, or wear anything but a full body suit?

The third was the fact that Wade was not mentally stable. Hell, the merc had voices in their head. What if they did something because "White" or "Yellow" told them to? What if they killed someone, or killed Peter, or hurt themself? That was a scary thought.

The fourth thing was that Peter had no idea how old they were. Spider-Man was only 18. Legal, he thought snidely, but would that be enough for Wade? Would it be enough for himself? Peter supposed the last item on his personal list might be solved if he merely asked the merc how old they were.

He sighed. "Why do you kill people?" Spider-Man asked the cloudless sky. "Why does anyone kill people?" Peter flopped onto the sandy mound he had previously made and closed his eyes. "I think I like you anyway," he said slowly. It felt so good to talk, to get it out of his system. "You're so-"

He heard a crunch of sand under a boot, and his eyes flew open. He turned quickly to see Wanda, his blush rising to his face. Peter was glad, once again, for his mask.

"I didn't mean to snoop," she said, holding her hands up in defense. "I just wanted to check on you, to see if you're okay."

Peter stiffened, but his Spidey-sense wasn't acting up, so he knew Wanda wasn't a threat.

"Um... how much did you, um, hear?"

"Enough to know for sure that you like Deadpool," she paused. "Don't worry, I'm not going to tell him."

"Them," he murmured.

"Them," she corrected. "Do you want to talk about it?" He very much wanted to talk about it.

"I-um, sure, I guess." Peter tried not to sound too eager.

"Okay," Wanda said calmly. "What's bothering you about it?" She came over closer to Spider-Man and sat on the sand in front of him.

"Well, you know, they're older..." Peter was going to take advantage of this free therapy session, goddamnit.

Wanda laughed. "Age gaps don't bother me. Vision is technically three years old."

"Really?"

"Yep. You're eighteen, right?" When Peter nodded, Wanda continued. "And Wade is, what, thirty-ish?"

"Well, I actually haven't asked..." She laughed again.

"You should work on that."

"I know."

"I'm sure its fine, anyway. What else is on your mind?" Wanda said kindly.

"They have voices in their head, and they kill people for money," Peter blurted out.

"The stone used to talk to Vision all the time, Spider-Man," she said carefully. "It didn't make him any less of a partner." Peter was quiet for a moment.

"But Wade's voices tell them to kill people."

"You're afraid they'll hurt you?"

"No, no," Spider-Man said quickly. "I don't know what I'm afraid of."

Wanda hummed in contemplation. "I think that you don't have much reason to believe that the voices have much of an impact on Deadpool's violent tendencies."

"You're probably right," Peter said softly.

"But it's still scary," Wanda added.

"Yeah."

"It was scary to me because I couldn't help Vision. I couldn't see the enemy. I couldn't fight it for him. Does that make sense?" It made a lot of sense, Peter thought. He nodded. "I just had to accept it. The voice was his fight, not mine," Wanda stared at the ground. "I wish I could've helped, but I just couldn't."

"Yeah."

"You've sort of reached the end of my expertise. Vision was never a mercenary," she said, somewhat apologetically. "But if I were you, I would talk to him about it."

"Them," Peter muttered.

"Did I say 'him' again? I'm sorry. Them."

"Thanks for the advice," Spider-Man stood up, and Wanda did the same.

"Any time, kid," she smiled at him, and they both began walking back to join the others.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Wade talks about their ex and Peter is very okay with it.
> 
> Two days, six hours after the disintegration.

"Spidey!" Deadpool yelled out, their arms stretched out in the air. "You're back, Baby!"

Peter had to smile at the grinning mercenary. He nodded contentedly.

"Can I have a hug?" Wade asked respectfully. After Peter nodded again, he was enveloped in their crushing embrace. "I'm so sorry. I get carried away, y'know? You were so fun to tease, love, but I didn't mean-"

"Wade- can't- I can't breathe-" The mercenary released him immediately. Peter gasped for air. Deadpool was incredibly strong.

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck! See, this is what I mean, Sweet-Cheeks, I get so carried away, I get so goddamn excited, and I didn't mean to make you run away, and fuck, I missed you, but Vision said-"

"Wade," Peter said softly. "It's okay. I was just feeling overwhelmed. Can we go somewhere else to talk?" He whispered, feeling the sideways glances of the other heroes.

"Anything for you. I mean- uh, sure," Deadpool said, and Peter almost missed the way they cursed under their breath afterward.

"I'm not mad at you," Spider-Man said calmly. "I just needed some time alone to process stuff."

Wade sighed with faux annoyance. "I wish I could relate. I need constant attention." They were only half-joking, Peter realized.

A moment passed.

"Have you ever been in love?" Spider-Man blurted out. Deadpool stared at him.

"Yes," they said, and their voice was low and serious. "Twice."

Spidey pulled off his mask. "Can you tell me about it?"

"Her name was Vanessa," Wade said after a moment's pause. "She wouldn't shut up, like me." They chuckled softly.

"Sorry," Peter said slowly. "You don't have to talk about it."

"No, it's okay, baby, I want to." Spider-Man didn't know why he shivered at the nickname when Wade had called him so many other names in the past few days. This felt... intimate.

"She was beautiful, love, she was so beautiful. I paid her like two-hundred bucks to just take her out on a date."

"What?"

"She was a prostitute."

"Oh." Peter's jaw dropped.

"That was back before I had all this," They gestured to their face, still covered by the mask. "Right after the army. Dishonorable discharge." Wade laughed. "I was makin' bank from the little guy, Sweetie. I'd rough up a stalker or two and then cash out. That was a good life."

Spider-Man waited for them to continue.

"Cancer sucked ass, baby. I was so scared. I knew I was gonna die, so I left V for the sketchy warehouse that fucked up my face. I hunted those motherfuckers for over a year. I finally had the courage to talk to V, and she accepted me, fucked up face and all." They swallowed hard. "And then," Wade said quietly, almost a whisper. "After a year, I lost her. Stupid, stupid mistake. I could've... I know, White, I know. Shut up."

Peter took their strong hand and laced their fingers with his. But Wade was okay. They weren't crying; they were calming down with Spider-Man's touch.

"I'm over it, honey, I swear. It's okay. Thanks." Peter felt something stir in his chest, and before he could question himself, he stretched and kissed Wade on the cheek, over their mask. Wade's reaction was not what he expected, but Peter thought that the merc was so unpredictable that he should stop assuming things from them.

They fell over. Wade was actually swooning.

They landed on their back into the sand, their hands covering their mask's eyes. "Baby..." they groaned.

"Um... Wade? Are you okay? Should I not have-"

The merc sat up quickly, and asked breathlessly, "Can I touch your face?"

Peter nodded, confused, but then sighed involuntarily when their gloved hands glossed over his jaw. One hand left his cheek, and he almost whined at the lack of contact, but it was only so that the could merc rip off their mask, their expression one of awe, oddly enough.

"Peter," Wade said, their voice was deep and hazy. "Can I kiss you?" His breath hitched, and the word was caught in his throat, so he signed instead.

 _Please,_ his hands were sloppy and sluggish. _I need it._

Wade smirked, just for a moment before brushing their lips across his cheek. Peter twisted his neck to seal the kiss, and Wade's rough skin felt so good under his soft lips. There was no tongue and no fighting for control, It was just Wade, and Peter could feel their heart beating quickly, and their mouth was so incredibly warm. Wade was an exceptional kisser, Peter thought, and he never wanted to stop. It was just so intimate; Peter had never felt a kiss this intimate.

Wade pulled away reluctantly, their eyes still glossy with lust.

"Okay?" They asked, breathing hard.

"God," Peter couldn't seem to form sentences. "So good." Wade grinned, showing teeth, and Peter scooted onto their lap. He pushed his face into their chest to feel Wade's rapid heartbeat. Peter traced light circles over the leather suit and sighed contentedly. The mercenary ruffled Spider-Man's hair affectionately with one hand, and their other hand traveled to Peter's side. He felt so warm and safe with Wade, and he never wanted to be anywhere else.

Peter started worrying when he realized what had just happened.

"W-Wade?" He said, voice shaky.

"Are you okay, baby?" The merc asked, concerned. "Yeah, I just- um... how old are you?"

They laughed. "That's what you're worried about, Sweetie?" Peter nodded slightly. "I'm thirty-two." They shifted nervously. "Baby, as long as you're legal, I'm okay with it," Wade added quickly.

"Okay..." It was only fourteen years. That's not the end of the world, Peter supposed, especially when the kiss was that good.

"I'll never, ever take advantage of you, love, for your age or for any other reason." Wade was sincere.

"I know." Peter did know. He trusted Wade to listen and always ask before they did something. But the age wasn't the biggest hurdle in their relationship (Was it a relationship? What's a relationship?).

"I need to talk to you about something else," Peter said nervously.

"Go for it, babe."

"The only other thing that's holding me back is- well... you kill people. For money. I can't- that's not morally right, in my book."

Wade dropped their hands. "Well, for one, it doesn't seem to be holding you back." They smirked when Spider-Man blushed. "And two, I don't know how else to support myself. I mean, if we were trapped in this heaven forever, I'd never kill again, 'less someone was tryna kill me or you. But on Earth... I just don't know."

"You still think this is heaven?"

"It's a new development, Sweetie. You just let me kiss you. It has to be heaven." Peter couldn't help grinning.

"I just hope the author will be nice enough to let us stay here for a while..." Wade mused.

"What?"

"You know, of this fic."

"I'm sorry?"

"Never mind. No one ever understands that one." Wade was smiling anyway.

"Maybe I shouldn't blame you for killing people," Peter wondered out loud.

"I'd be okay with that," Wade added unhelpfully. 

"Shut up." He playfully slapped their chest. "Everyone's morals are different."

"And I'm stunningly attractive," Deadpool supplied. Peter chose to ignore that comment, even though he might agree.

"I just... who am I to judge?" He asked. "And you don't kill for nothing, right? It's only people who've done something to another person?"

"Yeah," Deadpool said roughly. "Sex offenders, terrorists, overly-zealous stalkers, murderers: that's pretty much my clientele."

"Oh." That was definitely preferable.

"How many...?" Peter couldn't seem to finish that sentence.

"Over two-hundred, now," Wade looked a little nervous. "Forty-one in the army. I've lost count elsewhere."

Spider-Man was beginning to question all of his morals.

"Okay." He said a little breathlessly.

"Okay?" Wade raised his eyebrows. "Does that mean I can kiss you again?"

Peter nodded, and their lips met his own.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter and Wade talk about food and then fall asleep. And maybe they kiss a little.
> 
> Two days, nine hours after the disintegration.

All they had done for the last three hours was talk and kiss, leaving Peter's lips swollen.

Spider-Man had told Wade everything, all about his life and his family, all about MJ and Gwen. Wade had shared funny stories from then they were in the army.

"One time," they had said, laughing, "Sarg' told us all to get camouflaged, y'know, with leaves and sticks and stuff. But there were all these wildflowers, Petey. So me and a buddy covered ourselves, head to toe, in flowers. We even stuck flowers in our gun barrels! Lemme tell ya, we had to do so many push-ups. It was worth it, though, you shoulda seen his face, Baby!"

Now, it was nearing the sunless sunset, and Peter didn't want to leave Wade, but he also didn't want the other heroes to worry. Deadpool had the solution.

"We're sleeping over here!" They screamed, after telling Peter to cover his ears. "They prolly heard," Wade told him.

A few moments later, Peter was the little spoon, feeling safe and warm from Wade's touch.

"Wade," Peter sighed. "I'd kill for a shower."

"Baby, all I want right now is to be hungry again, and then have a huge plate of chimichangas."

"God," Spider-Man moaned. "Even a Burger. Like, really greasy. Five Guys, maybe."

"And a milkshake," Wade added.

"Yeah, oh my God. I never knew I'd miss eating so much." He groaned again, thinking about all the greasy foods he could be eating.

"Are you getting turned on by food?" The merc asked him, and Peter could hear his teasing grin. "Because those are some pretty noises you're making right now." Deadpool's hand skimmed over his thigh, and Spider-Man shivered despite his embarrassment at their comments.

"N-no! Shut up, Wade," he protested, but he was smiling.

"Can I have a kiss?" The merc asked gently.

"Of course." Peter twisted his head to meet his lips with theirs. Wade's tongue slipped over his lips, asking for entrance, and Peter granted it, opening his mouth for them. Wade's tongue was wet and warm, and all Peter could feel was them, and their teeth and their tongue, and it felt so good, Spider-Man wanted to moan.

When Wade bit his bottom lip, he did moan, and he could feel them smile into a deeper kiss. Their teeth skimmed over Peter's lips, and tongue it was heaven, he swore.

Wade pulled away slowly and reluctantly, kissing Peter's cheeks and chin as they held him tightly.

"Angel," they said between kisses. "As, mm... nice as this, mm, is... mm, I think we should sleep."

"Okay," Peter yawned and snuggled close to Wade again. His eyelids were heavy, and his eyes slipped shut, and he was content.


	10. Chapter Ten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Wade and Peter both spar with T'challa, and Wade gets nervous.
> 
> Three days after the disintegration.

Peter had lost track of time, so he decided only to count the days. He was awake, as usual, before Deadpool, but this time he decided to wake them.

"Wade," he whispered, touching their shoulder gently. "Wake up."

The merc groaned and rolled over into their back. "I'm up, mom, I'm up!" They shoved their face into the sand, falling back asleep.

"Wade!" Peter said urgently.

"Peter?" The merc sat up quickly. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I just wanna do stuff today." Peter blushed at their concern.

Deadpool visibly relaxed. "Like what?" They asked flirtatiously. "More make-out sessions with yours truly, the sexiest-"

"No," Peter responded. "Well, maybe. But that's not what I had in mind."

'Pool raised an eyebrow.

"I want you to show me how to fight."

"Really?" Wade's eyes widened in delight. "Why? Oh wait, you were never trained! I forgot. Yeah, Baby Boy, I'd love to show you some moves."

Peter grinned. "Could we also get T'challa to help? I'd die to be trained by Deadpool and the Black Panther."

"Whatever you want, Angel."

Peter helped Wade to their feet, and they raced each other to the figures ahead of them, with Deadpool winning, just barely.

"I almost beat you, 'Pool," Spider-Man coughed, out of breath from the sprint. "Next time you won't be so lucky."

"T'challa!" The merc wheezed. "Spidey wants us to teach 'im how to fight!"

"Spider-Man, is this true?" T'challa strode up to Peter elegantly.

"Yeah," Peter said. "Um, I mean, yes, sir."

The Black Panther laughed. "Please, do not be formal with me. I am no king here." He continued. "I would be honored to assist in your training, Peter, but I must ask: why do you need training?"

"Um..." Peter was unreasonably embarrassed. "I was never formally trained?" The statement came out like a question.

"You are surprisingly skilled for your lack of training," T'challa commented. "You would make a good student."

 _T'challa: smash or pass_ , Wade signed.

Peter giggled.  _You first_ , he signed back.

 _Totally smash. Please answer_. Wade was grinning and signing fast.

 _Smash_ , Peter signed quickly.

 _Maybe we could have a threesome?_  Wade laughed out loud at their own joke.

 _In your dreams_ , Peter responded.

"Ahem," T'challa drew the attention of the giggling heroes. "I'm assuming you didn't know I knew ASL?" He was trying hard not to laugh.

 _Fuck_ , Wade signed.  _He knows_.

"Stop it, Wade!" Peter's face was bright red, but he was still laughing. He turned to the king. "I am so sorry."

"I am flattered, but I do have a woman at home." T'challa couldn't help the laugh that escaped his mouth.

"Damnit, does that mean you're straight, then?" Wade grinned.

"Not necessarily. M'baku is very handsome." T'challa smiled.

"Fuck yeah! Let's form a pride club or something! I'm Deadpool; I'm pansexual and agender-"

"Wade, can I learn how to fight, now?" Peter was smiling.

"Of course! I got off track again."

T'challa dragged the toe of his boot in the sand to make a lopsided circle.

"First rule of fight club," Wade started jokingly. "Is to never talk about fight club, baby."

Peter groaned at the bad joke. He was so excited to learn and spar with Deadpool and Black Panther.

"Deadpool," T'challa said. "I would love to see your skill level, too. Shall we spar first, no weapons?"

"Fuck yeah! I'mma best your ass, Cat-Boy!" They unsheathed their katanas and pulled out more guns than Peter thought was possible to fit in the tight leather suit. Deadpool handed him their katanas and what Peter assumed was their favorite gun. "Guard these with your life, angel. Can't risk losing my babies," they winked, and Peter thought it was a little disturbing that Wade equated weapons with children.

They cracked their knuckles, grinning widely at the Black Panther, whose smile was reserved. After all the weapons were removed, the two fighters stood on different sides of the circle.

Deadpool rushed first, executing a beautiful spinning kick to the Panther's side. T'challa got a grazing mark on his side before he dodged it. Deadpool landed, off-balance, and T'challa threw a perfect uppercut to the mercenary's chin.

"Oof, is that all ya got, Pussy Cat?" They lifted their mask monetarily to spit out a tooth and a wad of blood and saliva, then quickly punched Panther in the gut, making him lurch backward. Peter gasped as 'Pool flew through the air to kick him, but T'challa was too fast and grabbed their leg, throwing their body to the ground. He rushed to pin the merc, successfully doing so. Wade punched him once more on his arm, hard, but the Black Panther held his makeshift headlock fast, choking Deadpool, who was now weak from lack of air.

"You're- s-s-trong," Wade wheezed out, still being choked. "That's kind of-f a turn on- fuck!" Panther punched them hard in the gut.

"Are you finished, Deadpool?" T'challa asked calmly. Wade couldn't speak anymore, so they held up a weak thumbs up, and the Panther released them immediately.

'Pool gagged and coughed, but they were grinning happily. Peter couldn't help but run to them.

"Wade, are you okay?"

The merc laughed into a fit of coughing, and then said, "Baby, I can't die! I'm always okay." They laughed some more, and Peter relaxed. "T'challa, you're good at that, fuck."

"You were too aggressive, Deadpool," the king responded. "Learn your defense."

"Says the guy who got punched in the face in, like, the first minute," the merc retorted, smiling.

"Peter, would you like to be next?" T'challa asked. Peter nodded, though he was a little nervous.

"Fuck, wait," Deadpool protested. "You can't hurt him."

"I would never seriously injure anyone in ritual combat, Deadpool. Peter has the ability to stop the fighting at any moment." T'challa had on a lopsided smile.

"I just... fuck. Give him a safe word, or something." Wade was clearly distressed, but Peter didn't understand why.

"Wade," Spider-Man said quietly. "What's wrong? I can handle getting hurt."

The merc was agitated. "Please, Baby, just a safe word, please? What about 'red'?"

"Okay," Peter relented, watching 'Pool's nervous body language.

" 'Red' it will be, then. Let's spar, Peter," said the king.

"Go get 'em, tiger." Wade looked much calmer now.

Spider-Man turned his focus towards the fight and observed Black Panther's body language as he walked to the other side of the circle.

"Remember, no weapons," said T'challa calmly. Peter nodded, his hands shaking in anticipation.

And then the Panther was lunging at him, and Peter flipped and turned, and barely dodged the hit. He could feel his heart racing, and a surge of adrenaline went through him as he tried to kick T'challa, but the king threw him aside as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Spider-Man lost his balance, and just as he was regaining it, the king landed a wicked punch to his jaw.

"Agh..." he groaned in pain, but he retaliated, throwing an elbow to the other man's neck. It landed, but Peter barely had time to feel triumphant before T'challa flipped him completely over, and ouch, that one hurt, and the breath was knocked out of him, and he was disoriented and on his back in the sand. Peter gasped, trying to stand again, but he couldn't catch his breath fast enough. The king ran around him and threw his head in a headlock.

"R-red!" Peter squeaked, and T'challa let go of him as quickly as he could. Wade was already sprinting over to them. They pushed the Black Panther out of the way, lightly, but hard enough that he got the message and took a few steps back, his hands raised defensively.

Deadpool's hands shook as they came closer to Peter.

"Baby, can I hold you?" Their voice was hushed.

"No, Deadpool, I'm fine," Peter said, irritated. "This isn't the worst pain I've been through." He frowned.

The merc looked sad, but Spider-Man held fast. He finally got up, and his breathing began to even out.

"Peter," T'challa said quietly. "Do you want to spar with Deadpool, now? I'm sure you could learn a lot from them as well."

'Pool was still somewhat sulky, but their mood brightened immediately after hearing their correct pronouns. "Is that a they/them I heard? From someone other than Peter?" They smiled a little, and then skipped over and kissed the king on the cheek, over both of their masks.

Peter's face burned, and he felt horribly sick to his stomach. "I... I think I'm done for the day."

"Of course, Peter," T'challa tried to make him feel a little better and then turned to Wade. "Deadpool, that was inappropriate. Please don't do it again."

"Sorry," The merc muttered, turning away. "Shoulda asked first."

Peter was tired of being treated like a child; Wade needed to know their limits.

His reasoning, though, didn't stop the twist of guilt that knotted in his stomach when Wade wandered off, looking distinctly upset and out of place.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter doesn't want to sleep with Wade.
> 
> Four days after the disintegration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mentions of suicide

Vision and T'challa had been talking late last night, and Peter only heard them because he couldn't sleep. He was cold without Wade next to him, holding him tightly.

Wade was not doing well. They had been wandering around late last night talking to White and Yellow, cursing and trying not to shout. Peter felt so goddamn guilty, but he really didn't want to face the mercenary. Now, early in the morning, Deadpool was asleep, and Peter was watching them like a creep.

Wanda had tried to interact with him earlier. Spider-Man had waved her off, still upset. If Wade treated him like he was a fragile child, then there was no one who wouldn't, he reasoned.

Vision came over, almost gliding across the sand. Peter frowned, but he allowed the cyborg to sit near him.

"Spider-Man," Vision said. "T'challa and I have decided that it is best for us to rejoin the others. This is a vast and most likely infinite wasteland, and we should find nothing if we stay apart."

Peter shook his head. "But Vision," He said, worry seeping into his voice. "Deadpool got kicked out. They can't go back."

The cyborg sat next to him. "Peter, T'challa and I will do what we can to convince the other party that Deadpool should be allowed back. And, if not, I'm sure they'd be all right on their own."

"Okay."

"Peter, one more thing," Vision said. "You really should talk to them. Deadpool is... very distressed over the situation between you two."

Peter grimaced. "Fine." He turned away from Vision, and the cyborg got the message and left.

Peter steeled himself and wandered over to see the mercenary, who was sitting alone away from the rest of the group. He tried not to think about how good it felt to kiss them.

Deadpool didn't even notice Spider-Man coming closer. Apparently, they were engrossed in their own thoughts and conversation with the voices.

"Ay, fuck off, Yellow, I ain't jokin' this time. I'll blow my fuckin' brains out just to get you to shut your goddamn mouth, prick."

Peter stopped. "Wade," he said softly as if any small noise would startle the merc.

"Fuck! Pete, I'm sorry, I'm so goddamn sorry..." their voice cracked a little.

"Wade," Peter repeated. "You were gonna kill yourself?"

Wade's mask's eyes went wide. "No! Baby, I can't die, 'member? I just..." they scratched the back of their neck, clearly uncomfortable. "It shuts the voices up for a while. It's a... trick I learned."

Peter stared at them. "Wade, I'm sorry, too. I just don't wanna be treated like a kid anymore."

"I know, Webs, I know, and I was stupid enough to think that Puss would hurt you and that you could get hurt that easy... God, I'm so fuckin' dumb-"

"You're not dumb, Wade."

Deadpool laughed. "That's nice of you."

"I'm serious."

Wade looked at him with an expression he didn't recognize, especially through the mask.

 _Baby,_  they signed. _Please come closer._

"Having trouble speaking, Wade?" Peter asked, but he went over closer to them anyway. He sat in front of the merc on the rust-colored sand and looked at them levelly.

 _It's even harder when you're close like this_ , Wade signed, and Peter's heart skipped a beat. He pulled off his mask, and Wade discarded theirs.

 _Remember those times when I'd follow you around on your patrol?_  Deadpool's hands moved fast.  _And you'd get so fucking annoyed with me?_  They grinned.

"Of course I remember," Peter nearly whispered.

 _I liked you even then,_  they signed slowly.

"Really?"

_Really, baby boy._

Peter covered his mouth with his hands, breathing out slowly.

 _Please,_  Wade signed.  _Let me kiss you again. Please._

Peter pushed their drawn-up knees aside and crawled on top of the mercenary to meet their lips with his. Wade's hands went immediately to his hips, their thumbs pressing into bone, and they kissed him with an intensity Peter had never felt. Their tongue flicked over his lips, and he swore he saw heaven.

Wade broke the kiss but left a trail of small ones to Peter's ear, and he shivered at the merc's rough lips on his skin.

"Angel," Wade nearly growled into his ear. "We can do whatever you wanna do, but Jesus Christ, do I want to be on top of you right now."

Peter let out a low sound of approval and nodded, letting Wade flip him so that he was on his back in the sand. The merc hovered over him and kissed his neck under his chin.

"Wade..." Peter groaned, feeling needier than he ever had. He was hard from just kissing.

"God, Angel, if you say the words I'd fuck you right here, with those noises you're making."

Peter moaned again at the words, but he retained his self-control. "No, I don't want-"

He stopped when Wade immediately got off of him and whined at the loss of contact.

"What don't you want, Angel?" They said quickly.

"I just... I just don't want to sleep with you... Please kiss me again..." Peter had trouble getting the words out.

"Anything." And Wade went back on top of him, and they kissed him on his neck again.

"You look so pretty, Angel," Wade said lowly and kissed him again. "Are you already turned on for me?"

Peter blushed and pulled the merc closer so he could bury his face in their shoulder. He nodded.

"Wanna know a secret, baby?" Wade smiled into another kiss, and Peter nodded again. "I am, too."

Peter pushed his lips onto theirs again and ghosted his hands over Wade's toned chest.

"Wade," Peter said contentedly after he broke the kiss. "I just wanna sleep next to you tonight."

"Mm," Wade murmured happily. "That sounds amazing."

Peter assumed his little spoon position, and Wade warmed his back behind him. They both fell asleep immediately.


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Wade asks a brave question and tells a story to make Peter laugh.
> 
> Five days after the disintegration.

Peter awoke with a warm body holding him tightly. He looked over and saw that the mercenary was awake, too.

"Mornin' babe," Wade sighed happily. "Is it creepy that I was watching you sleep?"

"Only a little," Peter smiled and kissed them on the cheek.

"Angel, I know this is kinda fast, but I wanna make this real."

Peter was confused. "What?"

"Will you be my boyfriend?" Wade looked hopeful, but a little nervous.

"Oh! Oh, uh... Yeah. Yeah, I'll be your boyfriend." Peter laughed a little, and Wade apparently couldn't stop themself from grinning.

"What do... What do I call you?" Peter asked. "Not girlfriend or boyfriend, right?"

"Partner works. Or bae. Or boo. Or lover. Or sexiest motherfu-"

"Partner is great." Peter stopped them on that endless train.

"Of course, boyfriend." They winked.

The two of them cuddled for a little while longer before Peter spoke.

"We're leaving today, I think. Did they tell you that?"

"Leaving? Those absolute easy-bake oven fuckers didn't tell me nothin'."

"Easy-bake oven?" Peter asked.

"That's like, the worst insult. After wet socks," Wade informed him. "Nobody has ever liked an easy-bake oven."

"You're right."

"Any-who," Deadpool said. "Where are we headin' to?"

Peter frowned. "Back to where we came from."

"God-fucking-christ! Shit-birds! But they're so goddamn lame."

"I know, I'm sorry, I don't know what to do about it."

"Ah, don't worry 'bout it, baby. S' not your fault." They sighed. "It's my fault for getting kicked out."

"Yeah," Peter agreed. "But if Strange hadn't gone off on you like that... I think it was a joint effort."

"And Fury's so goddamn pissy!" Wade added. "I worked for him for, like, a day. And yeah, I lied about knowing how to fly a jet. Yeah, I took it out on a mission that definitely didn't need it. And yeah, I wrecked it real bad, but he didn't have to punch me in the face before he fired me!"

"You... You did that?" Peter was laughing.

"I've been 'round the block a few times, Angel," Deadpool said, laughing a little.

"God, that's hilarious. I guess that's why he hates you so much."

"Well..." The merc said, grinning. "I wouldn't say that's the only reason."

They both laughed some more and then got up to go and talk to T'challa and Vision. Before they left, Deadpool spoke again.

"Baby, how would you feel 'bout telling the others of our 'lationship? I'd love to shout it from every rooftop, but if ya don't wanna, I understand."

Peter breathed deeply. "Well," he said slowly. "I think they already know since they could probably see us from where they were, or at least our silhouettes. So I think I'm okay with that."

Deadpool smiled sheepishly. "Oops."

Peter shrugged, and they both put on their masks.

"Can I hold your hand?" The merc asked.

Peter grabbed their hand instead of responding, and the couple walked towards the rest of the group, 'Pool singing softly along the way.

"Oh I, got that somethin', I think you'll understand," They sang. "When I, feel that somethin', I wanna hold your hand. I wanna hold your ha-a-and! I wanna hold your hand."

Peter smiled and glanced up at the singing merc.

"And when I touch you I feel happy, inside. It's such a feelin' that, my love, I can't hide." They sang, pointing at Spider-Man whenever it made sense within the song.

They reached the rest of the group, who were all just waking up.

"Glad to see you back, Deadpool." T'challa came striding up to meet them. The merc just grinned and glanced down at their clasped hands.

"Congratulations, you two." The king nodded at their hands, and then said: "We will be leaving very shortly." He turned away, apparently to talk with Vision. Wade looked down at Peter (a little over 6'2" is a full seven inches taller than his slight 5'7" frame) to see him blushing. They ruffled their boyfriend's hair affectionately, and Peter edged closer to them, pushing his head to their side. Wade draped their arm over his shoulders, and the two of them stayed like that, waiting for the others to awaken.


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's here? Guess. Yep! It's Deadpool, taking over this chapter.
> 
> It's all in my fucking point of view.
> 
> Ha. Where's your God now?
> 
> What's that? Christ. How would I know how long it's been since I fuckin' dissolved? Has my boy been keeping track? 
> 
> Whatever. Fuck you.
> 
> Love,
> 
> 'Pool

I stared happily down at my baby's face. God, he's so adorable. He's -oh shit! He's pushing his face into my chest. God.

 _Our chest_ , Yellow snarled, ruining the moment.  _S' not jus' yer body, dumbass._

I gritted my teeth, trying not to reply out loud.

 _Did I miss somethin'?_  White woke up.

Please, guys, c'mon, let's keep this moment. It's so fucking nice, see? Look at Webs, he's so cute!

 _Yeah_ , Yellow agreed.  _Why would 'e ever wanna be with an ugly motherfucker like us?_

C'mon, Yellow, you know I agree with you, but just...let me have this moment. Please.

 _Fine_. Yellow coughed.  _But for the record, you said that about the last twelve moments._

White began laughing maniacally, so I flicked the side of my head to shut her up. She growled at me, but let me be.

Back in the land of the sane, Petey was watching Pussy-Boy talk to the other members of our group. Looks like we're leaving now.

 _No shit, Sherlock_ , Yellow retorted. I could hear him yawn.

Please shut up, guys. I'm begging you. Jesus.

Petey unwound himself from my arms and grasped my hand. He's so little, and tiny, and cute...

 _Fuck him!_  White yelled. She was always yelling.  _Fuckhimfuckhimfuck-_

Okay, thanks, that will be all. Mercifully, she shut her stupid trap, and Petey and I walked hand in hand with the rest of the group. The day stretched out ahead of us, and God knew it was gonna be a long one. I glanced over and saw that my tiny boyfriend was looking at me and biting his irresistible lip.

"What is it, love?" I asked, and he blushed and looked away. The voices weren't gone when I was with him, but they sort of faded away into the background. All my attention needed to be on him and his divine glory.

"Nothing, Wade."

Nothing?

"Baby..." I whined.

 _He thinks you're disgusting_ , hissed Yellow, but I ignored the box.

"I just- you look- well, you just look good right now." Petey stuttered adorably. I'm sure I made the biggest heart eyes.

I stopped walking. "Can I pick you up, baby boy?" When he nodded, I lifted him in front of me, his legs wrapping around my waist. My arms wrapped around his back, to keep him from falling, and he giggled. Adorable.

I kept walking, but I just stared at his perfect, unmasked face.

"Wade," he said quietly. "Lemme kiss you."

I hesitated. "Are you sure, Baby?" I asked. I was stupidly worried about my scars, and the rest of the group seeing. Dumbass.

 _No kidding_ , mumbled Yellow.

 _Please_ , Peter signed, and I lost any self-control that I had left. I yanked up my mask and tried not to crash my scarred lips to his pretty ones too fast.

Whenever we've kissed, I swear to God, everything melts away. The boxes, my scars, his nervousness. It's so goddamn cliche, but there it is.

And then I'm an idiot because I'm laughing at how different my baby is from Vanessa. I felt Petey frown under me.

"What's so funny?" He was upset. Fuck, he thought I was laughing at him.

"Baby, I'm sorry, I just thought it was funny how different you were from V."

He frowned again. "In what way?" I gripped his legs tighter, trying to word this right, trying not to fuck this up.

"V was... V was loud. She was sarcastic and bitchy and hilarious. We worked because she matched how talkative I am," I said carefully. I didn't want to compare my ex with my current boyfriend. It just sounded like a recipe for disaster. "You're so... You're not that at all. We work because..." Yikes. I was a fucking sap. I glanced at Petey to make sure I wasn't overstepping anything, but he seemed eager to hear more. "We work because we balance each other out. Okay, that's cliche. Fuck this dumbass author. Like, you're quiet, and I'm loud, and I make you louder, and you make me shut the fuck up."

 _Maybe you should consider shutting the fuck up now_ , Yellow snarled.

 _Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!_  White piped up.  _Fuckfuckfuck!_

Guys, please. Shhh.

 _Yes, Yellow_ , White said ironically.  _This is a good moment. We need to pay attention._

"Really?" Peter gave me a small smile. "You think we work well together?"

I almost wheezed. Jesus. There's been unlimited chemistry, we've resolved our fights in hours, and I wanted to tell the kid I loved him after, like, five days. Oops. Wasn't supposed to say that. Ignore that, reader.

I just raised my eyebrows. "You don't?" He was blushing. Goddamnit. I just wanted to... God. There were so many things I wanted to do to him. More than a few included fucking.

He shook his head quickly. "No! It's just...affirming to hear it from you." I kissed his forehead. I was still carrying him as I walked slowly, slightly apart from the group. He was so light, it didn't even bother me, but that might've been partly because his pretty thighs were wrapped around my waist. What can I say? I have a dick.

"Wade?" Peter said softly. Focus, Deadpool.

"Yes, baby boy?"

"What- uh, sorry to ruin the moment. But I'm afraid of what Fury and the others will do when we get there. What do you think?"

I felt my chest tighten. "I think," I couldn't help gritting my teeth a little. "I think that if that bastard even looks at you the wrong way --after that stunt he pulled-- I'm gonna chop him in half."

He froze. Shit. Maybe that was too harsh.

 _Idiot_ , Yellow murmured.

"Uh... I mean... Fuck. I'll make sure he doesn't attack anyone?" I grimaced. It was definitely too much.

 _You'd kill for me?_  Peter signed, his mouth still slightly parted from shock.

"I- well- I'm trying to hold the killing back, 'cause my boyfriend ain't a fan. But that just kinda slipped out." I grasped desperately at any humor to diffuse the situation. To my surprise, it seemed to work, and his face returned to a slight smile.

"But you would. You'd kill for me, wouldn't you?" Peter was acting so weird. What the fuck was going on in his head?

 _What's going on in yours?_  Yellow rasped. I ignored him.

"Well- I don't know..." I lied and then felt bad for lying to my boyfriend. "Yeah. I- uh... I'd kill for you. Sorry." Jesus Christ. I'm a train wreck today.

"Why are you sorry?" Peter frowned. "That's like, the most romantic thing you've said."

What? What? What?

 _What?_  White yelled.

"But, Petey, or the alien that is currently inhabiting his body, you hate killing!" I protested. "Like you hate it! You almost wouldn't kiss me!"

He looked away. "Yeah, but babe, if you really feel that way, then, of course, I'm gonna take it... I dunno. It made sense at the time."

I stared at him. "Did you just call me babe?"

"Uh- what? No! I would never." He was blushing for like, the millionth time today. He must blush every two minutes.

I kissed him. I didn't ask first, but I knew he wanted it. He was so fidgety. I knew I had guessed right when he leaned in close and slipped his tongue into my mouth.

I took control of the kiss and moved my mouth on top of his so that my teeth could bite that precious lip. I did, and he sighed in pleasure. I kept his lower lip between my teeth and rolled it carefully, making sure it didn't hurt too much. I got a real moan for my efforts, and it went straight to my dick. I love rewards.

I cupped his ass, making sure I was slow enough so that he could get me off at any time, but he just wiggled it a little, and I was so goddamn turned on.

I kissed his cheek and gave up on walking. We could catch up with the group later. Now was all about him, the ethereal being on top of me. I flipped us so that he was placed gently into the sand on his back, and I hovered over him to kiss his neck. He squirmed, and I relished in his slight embarrassment.

"Can I," I was breathing so hard, just from kissing. "Can I pin your hands above your head?" I asked. "I like- I like the control. You can tell me to stop any-"

"I know," his face was flushed, and he was nearly panting. "I know you'll stop if I want you to. Please, pin them."

"Remember the safeword you used with T'challa?" I mumbled. "Red? Use that if you're done." He nodded, and I took both of his hands in one of mine and put them above his head. I felt him test my strength, but I held fast. With my other hand, I grabbed his jaw and kissed him, and now I was entirely in control, and he was opening up to me, and my dick was loving it.

My hand traveled down his body towards his thighs, and I watched his face carefully as I brushed the skin directly beneath his stomach. He shut his eyes tightly, twisting his body in aggravation.

"I'm gonna touch you, okay, baby?" I managed to speak, and he nodded, biting his lip and still shutting his eyes.

I only hesitated for a moment before I palmed him through his Spidey suit. He was hard, and that fact turned me on even more.

"Wade..." His face contorted, and I got slightly concerned.

"Baby," I said softly. "Are you sure you want this?" I saw a tear slide down his cheek. "Red," I said loudly, releasing his hands immediately.

"I'm sorry!" He put his face in his hands, upset. "I've... I've never-"

It took every ounce of self-control I had not to touch him. "Please, baby, don't be sorry. You weren't ready. I'm just worried you won't use your safe word if you need to."

"C-can you hold me?" God, there was nothing I wanted to do more. I gathered his shaking frame into my arms and held him close.

"You didn't- you didn't cum. I'm sorry-" He stuttered.

"I'll live. It's a hard-on. I've had them before." It ached, but I wasn't about to make my boy feel worse.

"But I- I want you to cum."

What?

"What?"

"I wanted you to feel good- I'm sorry-" He was so cute. He cared about me getting off. He cared.

"If you're that intent on it," I mused (What? He was offering!) "There are ways of getting the job done that don't involve sex. In fact, I wasn't planning on giving you anything more than a blowjob today." I continued when I saw the intimidated look on his face. "Baby, what I'm saying is, you're so goddamn sexy, I could easily get off by touching myself to your voice."

He looked embarrassed but intrigued.

"Only if you want, of course," I added. I liked where this was going.

"Okay." I looked at him carefully. He seemed really okay with it.

"Safeword still applies, baby." He nodded, and I took off my gloves and unzipped my suit enough to pull my dick out. Petey and I were lying on the sand, face up.

"Wade..." He murmured near my ear. "You're... You're big." I groaned at that and wrapped my hand around my dick.

"Fuck... Say more shit like that," I begged him and began touching myself.

"You're- you're really hot. I was staring at you today when you asked me what was wrong. I can't- I can't keep my eyes off you."

It was embarrassing how close I was already. But that voice. Jesus. I rubbed harder.

"More," I moaned.

"All the little things you've done, Wade. I- every pet name affects me now. You saying it is just- it's just insane. How low and s-sexy your voice is to me..."

"I'm close already," I panted, not really wanting this to end.

"When you bite my lip, it feels so-"

I came, and I swear it was the sexiest thing I've ever experienced. I've had a lot of sex, and that was better than all of it. I let out a whiny noise, and then a groan, and I was spent. I turned to look at Peter, who was staring at me in awe.

"Okay?" I asked him.

"Yeah..." He trailed off and didn't take his eyes off of me. I smirked and zipped up my suit before kissing him again, making sure to bite his lip.


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which it rains. 
> 
> Five days after the disintegration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! So many people have read already & I'm kinda blown away?
> 
> Trigger warning: sensory overload/sensory related panic

Peter was in heaven. Wade’s scarred lips crashed against his, and they were kissing again. He was still a tiny bit turned on, and the ache in his stomach was powerful.

Wade broke the kiss abruptly. ”What the fuck?” they were saying, and Peter had only a minute to be confused before he realized what the mercenary was cursing at.

A fat drop of water landed on their nose.

”It’s... Raining?” Peter asked incredulously.

”What the fuck?” Deadpool repeated, and the rain fell faster. They grinned. ”I’ll take it!”

”I could use a shower, ” Peter laughed.

The water came down in sheets, and Spider-Man remembered a stoned Deadpool saying how much they loved storms. They had gotten up, and were now dancing wildly in the rain.

”Stand up like a soldier, baby!” They sang. ”Yeah, I know ya built like that! Gun it like a holster, baby! Show them that you're wicked like that!”

Peter frowned. He didn't know this song, but he still danced to the silent beat.

”What’s the matter, babe? You don't listen to Major Lazer?” Peter shook his head. What kind of name was 'Major Lazer'?

"We live where the war is raging, chasing our crazy dreams! Hoping that the bridge won't cave in, tonight we'll let it all go free!" They yelled over the roar of the rain. Peter was slightly overwhelmed by all the noise, but he shook it off as best he could.

"Give me the-" Wade was cut off by the brightest flash of lightning Peter had ever seen. "Jesus motherfucking-" The boom of the thunder was even more startling, and Peter dropped to the ground, immediately covering his ears. The noise pounded in his ears, and it hurt.

"God, stop, it hurts it hurts it hurts-" Peter whined, his heightened senses aching in the rain. He didn't notice Wade coming closer until he felt their hands help cover his ears. The mercenary pulled him onto their lap, giving him something else to focus on.

"Baby, baby boy, focus on me, okay? I'm all there is." Deadpool's voice rumbled softly, and it was a comforting noise, not a jolting one. "I wish I could get you outta this rain, angel, but I can't, and I'm sorry. But we're gonna ride it out, okay? It'll be okay."

They're all there is. Peter repeated it like a mantra, and it seemed to help, just a little.

He came back to reality, and he remembered how much he hated this. The feeling of complete powerlessness against... Sound. It was one of the curses of being Spider-Man.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, his voice muffled in Wade's leather suit. "I can't control it. Sometimes I just feel everything."

Deadpool kissed his temple. "There's nothing to be sorry about, darling," they said over the rain. "I'm just glad I could help."

Peter felt a surge of emotion, a feeling of affection and admiration, and couldn't help saying, "I really like you, Wade."

The mercenary pulled him closer. "I really, really like you, Peter." They kissed his damp hair. "You've turned me into a sap, Angel."

He smiled. The rain was letting up a little. Wade started humming, which evolved into a soft song.

"Uptown girl, she's been livin' in her uptown world. Bet she's never met a backstreet guy..."

"Billy Joel? Really?" Spider-Man laughed.

"She'll see I'm not so tough, just because I'm in love with an uptown girl..." Wade laughed between lyrics. "Uptown girl, you know I can't afford to buy her pearls..."

"Do you do anything but listen to music?" Peter wondered.

They shrugged. "And when she's walking, she looks so fi-i-ine, and when she's talking, she says she's mi-i-ine..."

The song ended and Wade stared at him silently.

"What?" Peter whispered. The rain had stopped.

"I have a bad feeling," they said. "That storm shouldn't have happened. We won't be here much longer, I can feel it. I'm afraid of..."

"Afraid of what?" Spider-Man was still whispering.

Losing you, they signed.

Peter's heart nearly stopped. He kissed the merc on the cheek.

"We're gonna be okay," he said. "I promise."

As if by one mind, the pair got up and began walking again. They clutched at each other's hands tightly, afraid to let go.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter (accidentally) rips Wade’s leg off. 
> 
> Six days after the disintegration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love my readers oh my gosh
> 
> Trigger warning: Panic attack mention, loss of limb

Peter woke with Deadpool’s arms around him, and he sighed in relief. A nightmare at shaken him badly, but for the life of him now, he couldn't remember what it was. They had both made it to the group of heroes, and without much protest, Deadpool was let back in. 

Wade was sleeping soundly, so he wiggled out of their grasp without walking them up. There were still lots of things bothering him about the wasteland, and he wanted answers. He walked up to Vision.

”Vision,” Peter said. “I have a few questions, and I wondered if you could answer them.” The cyborg looked at him expectantly, nodding. ”Why am I not hungry? How are we alive? What about the storm? You're the closest to the stone.”

Vision sighed. ”Peter, I don't know any of those answers. I have only guesses, as I'm sure you do as well,” he said, somewhat sadly. ”I believe you are not hungry because the stone acts as our nourishment. It's keeping us alive, Peter. I don't know why, but it is. It brought me back from the dead.”

Peter shivered. The implications of that...

”Does that mean if we somehow get out, we’ll all die?” He asked tersely.

Vision frowned. ”I don't know,” he muttered. ”I do know that the storm was caused by some sort of disturbance in the stone. That storm was painful to me, Peter. You weren't there to see it, but I doubled over. The stone was hurting, and I felt it all.”

”God,” Peter whispered. ”What’s gonna happen to us?”

”Dr. Strange has been trying to figure it out, but his powers are weak here. No one knows why. I hypothesized that the stone has some interference with them, but it is vastly beyond my ability-”

Vision was cut off by a loud crack. Peter turned towards the sound, and what he saw made his heart stop.

The land beneath their feet was breaking apart. Massive cracks began appearing throughout the sandy ground, and the gaps looked infinity deep. They were splitting the group in half.

Spider-Man threw on his mask and turned to check on Vision, who was groaning in pain on the ground, but safe. He looked out and saw Deadpool, on the other side of the growing ravine, awake and staring at Peter.

Spider-Man did the only thing he could think to do: he shot a web directly at Wade’s chest. It looked painful, and he could see the merc wince, and then back up to get a running start.

They ran with full force, and then leaped, but they could only make it about half way over the widening crack before Peter had to pull with all of his strength. Deadpool was dangling over the cliff, and Peter prayed that the web wouldn't break as he yanked Wade’s body over the ledge. A rock jutted into the merc’s chest, close to their heart. Too close.

They came up, but their leg got caught on the jagged edge and broke completely off. Wade passed out immediately, and Peter dragged their body to relative safety. He looked back, and thank God the other heroes were okay. Groot had grown over to the other side, and Wanda had used some sort of magic to get herself across and to Vision. Peter watched in horror as Groot split down the middle. He seemed to be in a great deal of pain, but okay.

After he made sure everyone else was safe, Peter turned his attention to his unconscious partner.

”Wade, wake up, please...” he murmured. ”You said you couldn’t die.” Still, he couldn't help panicking when he saw the shear amount of blood pooling from the merc’s torso. They had lost their entire leg, but thankfully the suit was still partially attached, although it was in shreds.

”Wade, please, I'll do anything...” His eyes welled with tears, and his hands shook as he glossed them over the merc’s chest. ”Wade...”

”Fuck, that one hurt. Heya, Baby Boy, how’re the kids?” Deadpool said, their voice strained. Peter fell on top of them, trying not to cry from relief. ”Christ, don't cry over me! I'm all right, darling, I’m always all right --look at you.”Wade’s hands went up to hold Sider-Man’s masked face.

”I thought- Wade, that rock stabbed you through the heart-”

”It’ll grow back. Don't you dare worry about me. It's my job to worry ’bout you.” Wade sat up, and Peter gasped at how fast they were healing. He had only seen their healing factor in action a few times before, and it was truly amazing. They yanked the rock out of their chest, wincing at the pain. Blood pooled out, but Peter saw the flesh knitting itself back together.

Wade laughed. ”Ha! That's like, the second leg this month!” They pointed at their lost limb. ”Baby, you stole my heart and my leg!” They frowned. ”Yellow says that was a dumb joke. Sorry.”

”Don’t be sorry,” Peter responded, in awe of the merc’s ability to heal.

”We can sew this suit right back up! Almost good as new, right White? We almost died! That was so cool, you guys!”

Peter thought that the merc had to be out of it if they were talking directly to their boxes. He looked over at Vision, who seemed to be having a panic attack. Wanda was crying and desperately trying to talk to him, but he refused to listen and was muttering something incoherent. The crack had stopped widening, and the wasteland was silent once more, with only Wade’s rambling breaking it.


	16. Chapter Sixteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Wade grows a new leg and sucks Peter's dick.
> 
> Six days after the disintegration.

Peter never left Wade’s side all day.

Spider-Man was shaken up by the prospect of Wade losing so much blood, even with their healing factor. He wasn't satisfied unless he could see Deadpool alive, moving, and cracking bad jokes to try and relieve the tension.

Wade’s new leg was growing slowly, but it had taken several hours to be the tiny one it was now. Peter thought it was gross, but he was glad that the leg was growing so quickly.

Deadpool had taken to repairing their torn suit. ”No, baby, I gotta do it,” they had protested when Peter offered. ”You saved my life, darling, I can sew a motherfucking suit.”

The number of dick jokes that was pouring out of the merc’s mouth was unfathomable, too. Apparently, the tiny leg had ”incredible potential, baby boy” for those jokes, in Deadpool’s words. Some of the best (or worst) included: ”Baby, look how happy I am to see you!” After lifting their leg. ”I’ve always wanted it to grow like this!” Was another good one, but the worst was when Wade started stroking it and pretended to be turned on.

The day had it's ups and downs, for sure.

Wade eventually hopped over to the rest of the heroes, who were gathered to try and find solutions to their current problems. Peter was eager, too, to hear what the group had to say about the day’s events.

”-and he’s still panicking like this! He knows what's going on, or at least, has the best guess out of all of us. We can't get out of this place without him, and we need to do it before he breaks down completely!” Wanda was hurting because Vision was still coming in and out of a panicked state.

”Crackscrackscracks in the dirt cracks in the sand cracking, breaking, crackcrackcrack-” muttered Vision deliriously. Wanda tried to hush him.

”Yikes,” Wade muttered under their breath, and Peter was sure only he could hear it. He pushed himself close to his partner’s side as the sky began to darken for the night. Deadpool slung an arm around him.

”We can’t leave,” Stephen Strange spoke. “I’ve been trying. Portals don’t work, my magic is weak. I can’t see the future. We’re stuck here until the stone decides we should be free.”

No one spoke, for a moment.

“I believe it is unwise to give up hope,” T’challa said. “Our resolve must be kept intact for us to survive.”

”The stone is alive.” Vision said, waking from his trance. ”It is our life support, but it is being destroyed. The Avengers are winning.” He smiled sadly. ”But this could mean the worst for us.”

Peter felt Wade tighten their grip on his shoulders. He could see the others pale at Vision’s words.

”That is what heroes do,” T’challa whispered. ”We chose to sacrifice ourselves when we fought Thanos. This is the final sacrifice, then, if what you say is true.”

”Woah, woah, let’s just put on the breaks for a sec, here. Let’s get this straight. You guys: fought Thanos. Brave. Heroes. Me? None of those things. I ain't ready to die yet, and I’d bet my dick that you ain't either, Puss-Boy. What happened to ’oh, the stone brought us together so we could fight our way out’? Your dumbass theory doesn't address so many details! Like why we're were put here together. Why the stone is keepin’ us from getting hungry. Why I'm here when I didn't even fight fucking Thanos! Like, the stone don't give a shit about Spideypool, so-” Wade stopped when they saw Peter’s stare. ”Y’all are here praising the stone,” they said, quieter. “So why don’t ya think the bitch knows what it’s doing?” Deadpool looked at Peter again and rubbed their arm up and down his back.

Silence followed.

“Wade’s right,” Peter said in a small voice. ”We can get out of this. The stone thinks we can, and I, for one, believe it. Or, at least, I want to.”

The talking seemed to be mostly over with, after the couple’s remarks, so Spider-Man and Deadpool left the circle quietly. Everything was dark, then, and the air seemed heavy and oppressive.

”Wade,” Peter murmured. “What’s gonna happen to us? I don’t wanna die, I wanna see Aunt May again. I wanna see Tony-“ He stopped when Wade’s hand glossed over his cheek.

“You’re not gonna die, baby. I won’t let you,” they responded directly. ”I won't.”

Spider-Man was quiet, so the merc continued.

”You saved my life today, baby, ” Deadpool said. ”That's pretty impressive.” They smirked.

”Couldn't save all of you, ” Peter reminded them.

”Don’t matter. The biggest piece always survives.”

”That's...really, really weird.”

”I know, ” they smiled. ”But it means we can have, like, super rough sex.”

Peter paled a little at that thought, and ’Pool laughed at his expression. Peter was sure it was hilarious even through the mask.

”Speaking of sex, ” they said quietly. ”How do you feel about it all? Can we talk about the important stuff, like limits, and kinks, and feelings?”

Spider-Man pulled off his mask, and Wade did the same.

”Yeah, ” Peter said reluctantly. ”I suppose it's a necessary conversation.”

”Okay, ” the merc sighed. ”What are your hard limits?”

Spidey felt dumb. ”My- what?”

”Absolute no-no’s. Definitely not’s. Does not turn me on one bit’s. Spooky’s. Why would anyone do that’s. Stuff you absolutely would never do in bed.” Deadpool said calmly.

”Geez- I don't know.”

’Pool shrugged. ”Mine are urine and feces, pet play, and knife play. Oh, and 24/7 dynamics.”

Peter was grossed out. He did not want to ask what any of those were.

”Okay, lemme ask you about some things, and you can say yes, no, or maybe, okay?”

”Okay.” He could say no. This was okay.

”Blindfolds.”

Blindfolds? That was a kink?

”Yes.”

Wade smiled. ”Light bondage. Handcuffs, stuff like that.”

”Y-yes.” Peter was embarrassed.

”Breathplay. Like, choking.”

That sounded scary. ”Maybe?”

Wade looked at him levelly. "Spanking."

He sucked in a breath. Peter did not need that image in his head, there was no way that turned him on, he wasn't thinking about Wade flipping him over on their lap and holding him down-

"Baby?" Wade looked concerned. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah! I'm good. I'm great." Peter's voice was way too high for that to be convincing.

"So... I'm guessing that's a 'no,' then?" Deadpool almost looked disappointed.

"Well, I don't know-" He coughed, even more embarrassed.

"Sweetheart, can I remind you that I already told you my limits? Spanking was not on that list. If you're into it, will you please tell me? Try and remember I'm kinky, too," Wade said slowly.

Oh.

"Okay. Okay, I'm- that's a yes."

"Really?" The merc looked delighted.

Spider-Man nodded, blushing.

"Do you wanna continue this conversation later?" They asked.

"I- I actually have some questions."

Wade raised their eyebrows, curious.

"Do you... I don't know how to phrase this. Do you like to be the one who..."

"Are you asking if I'm a top or a bottom, baby boy?" The merc smiled.

"Yeah."

They grinned wider. "I usually top. But I do love a good power exchange every once in a while."

"Why?" Peter was curious, now.

"Well, I like topping because I like having control over my partner, and I like it when they give me control. But it's fun to do things differently every once in a while, don't you think, cutie?" 'Pool touched his nose with their index finger. "What do you like, Angel?"

"I've never- I've never done anything-"

"What do you think you would like?" They asked calmly.

"Being a bottom," Peter replied, faster than he expected. "I don't like being in charge."

Wade leaned in and kissed him. It was slow and soft, but Peter melted at the touch. They took control quickly, with their tongue slipping in and out of his mouth.

"Please," Peter found himself whispering. He didn't know what he was begging his partner for until they bit down on his lower lip, hard. Wade went further and slid their teeth around his tongue. It felt amazing.

They broke the kiss and leaned into Peter's ear.

"Talk to me, baby boy," Wade's voice sent shivers down his spine. They nipped at his ear. "Tell me what you want, and I'll give it to you."

"B-blindfold," he managed to stutter.

Spider-Man could feel Deadpool grin right next to his ear.

"Tell me the safeword. Then I'll do whatever you want."

"Red," He nearly begged.

The merc pulled away and checked a few suit pockets before finding a rag. It only looked a tiny bit dirty, so Peter allowed them to tie the blindfold over his head. His heart raced with the prospect of not being able to see.

Wade's hands released the knot, and they went back into the kiss with new energy.

"Look at you," they spoke reverently between kisses. "Little one. All needy for me. Do you wanna feel how turned on I am right now?"

Peter nodded, slightly nervous, but more flustered at being called 'little one.' Wade guided his hand gently down, and Peter could feel their dick, hard like his own. Spider-Man touched them through their suit, lightly, and Wade let out a moan.

Their hands pulled Peter's back up to their chest. "This is about you, not me, Little Spider," they said quietly. "Can I touch you? Make you feel good?"

"Yeah," Peter groaned. Wade was so kind to him, and the more they showed they cared, the more Peter was getting turned on.

They rubbed him gently through the suit, testing his comfort level. Spider-Man was okay with it, though, and he moaned slightly, jutting his hips upward, desperate for more contact.

”Baby, ” Wade said, they voice thick with arousal. ”If you don't wanna cum in your suit, however sexy that would be, you might wanna take it off.”

”Mm... Okay...” Peter was too hot for the suit, anyway. ”Are we far enough away from the others?”

Wade kissed him again. ”Yes, ” they murmured.

Peter fumbled with the button that loosened the suit since he couldn't see, and he finally found what he was searching for. He felt the fabric being pulled off of him, and he felt the felt the first pang of nerves.

”Wade... Please, go slow, ” Spider-Man said, feeling vulnerable.

”Of course, Little Angel. Look at you. Gorgeous. I wanna take off your blindfold, just for a minute, okay? Just to let you see what's going on.”

Peter nodded, and Wade slipped the fabric from his head. Spider-Man couldn't help but be disappointed when he saw his partner still wearing their suit.

He pulled gently at the clothing. ”Off, ” he said impatiently, and Wade’s face paled.

”Are you- are you sure, baby?”

”Wade, ” he said, and he just wanted them, all of them. ”Please. I want to love you.”

Apparently, that was the right answer, because Wade looked dizzy as they pulled off their leather.

”Can I suck you?” they asked. ”I want to, so bad.”

Oh, God, they just said it, just like that, and now Peter was dizzy with lust, and he nodded, slightly nervously, but so ready for what Wade was about to give him.

The merc wasted no time in positioning Peter on the sand again and then hovered over him, kissing his stomach gently. They moved down, so slowly, but oh, it felt so good. His hips jolted in anticipation, and then their lips were on him, oh God...

”Wade, ” he moaned, and all the nerves dissipated, and were replaced with pleasure. The merc had definitely done this before, he decided. ”God, Wade.”

Their tongue swirled relentlessly around the boy’s cock for only about half a minute before Peter was whining, ”I’m gonna- Wade!” He expected the merc to come off and kiss him, maybe, but they just kept licking and sucking on it. Peter came, with a dull moan, and watched in shock as they swallowed it all effortlessly.

”That okay, Angel?” They said calmly as if they hadn't just done the hottest thing that Peter had ever seen. He nodded, his mouth wide.

”What about you?” Spider-Man said, worryingly.

Wade laughed. "I'm already done." They motioned to their dick. "You were too sexy for me, apparently."

Peter blushed, surprised.

"Baby Boy," Wade said happily. "Let's sleep."

And so Peter crawled into their arms, still very naked, but it was okay. Everything was okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear there will be real plot next chapter. Wade & Peter need some time to chill, yeah?


	17. Chapter Seventeen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the sky falls. 
> 
> Seven days after the disintegration.

Peter awoke shivering, even though he was wrapped up entirely in his partner.

”Wade!” He said urgently. ”Wake up!”

”Mornin’, love, what the McFuck is going on? My balls are ice cubes, baby!” Deadpool whined.

Spidey slid out of the merc’s arms, ignoring their pleas (”Webs, I'm so cold, I need your tiny space heater body!”) and pulled on his suit. Even with the body-heat trapping technology that he could enable on the costume, he still shuddered until he wormed back into his partner’s embrace. ’Pool had slipped on their gear, too, and the pair huddled close to each other for warmth.

”Is this a glitch in the matrix?” They joked.

”It’s gotta be the stone suffering again,” Peter answered seriously. ”I'm worried.”

”Yeah, and this author is cheesy as fuck, so third time’s the charm, yeah? I think somethin’ real bad is about to hit us, Petey.”

”Are you implying that we’re in a book?” Peter wrinkled his nose.

”Fanfic, kiddo. Try not to think so hard. It's sorta depressing when you think ’bout it.”

”I don't understand.”

”I know, angel.” Deadpool sighed.

A crash brought them back to reality. The two leaped up and looked around, trying to determine the sound. It had sounded like thick glass was being cracked or broken.

Wade wrapped their arm tightly around Peter's waist so that his back was up against their chest. ”You stay close, love. I don't know what's goin’ on, and I’d die if ya got hurt.”

Peter’s heart skipped a beat, and then the merc released him. Spider-Man did stay close, searching for any threat through the eyes of his mask.

”Baby! Look up!” Wade gasped, and Peter followed their outstretched arm to the sky. A massive crack appeared to be stretching and taking over the dome of what Peter could see.

”Holy-” Spidey was cut off by the sky falling.

The sky was falling.

Chucks of the dome were breaking off and crashing to the ground. Wade grabbed their boyfriend’s hand and started running, dodging sky as they went. Some of the pieces were no bigger than a baseball, but others were the size of a house.

”Spidey, c’mon! We can stare later!” Deadpool yelled over the noise, and he put his head down and ran with his partner.

They ran until they found the other heroes again. Groot was growing a protective tree dome around them, and Wanda and Strange were adding magic to strengthen it. Peter and Wade ducked inside, quickly.

”Christ, ” Wade was saying, but Spider-Man was feeling out of it. ”We coulda died.”

Peter collapsed onto the ground. He couldn't breathe. He glanced at the other heroes, and they, too, were losing strength. Spider-Man felt ravenously hungry all of a sudden, and his throat was so dry.

”Wade!” he yelled out hoarsely, but the merc looked weak, too. "Wade, please help me, I can't breathe-"

"Peter," Wade ripped off their mask, and he could see their eyes shining with tears. "Peter whatever happens, know that I love you. I wasn't gonna say it for another month, but- I do. I love you." They cried into his chest, and Peter found himself holding them tightly, crying too. He heard crashes outside of their dome, and everything fuzzed and blurred. He stared at his lover one last time, trying to keep the image in his foggy brain, and then everything went an eerie, still black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry...


	18. Chapter Eighteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter might be dead. 
> 
> He has no idea.

Peter was dead. He was sure of it.

He felt nothing, and nothing is bliss.

He prayed. Peter wasn't religious, but he was too afraid to pass it up. He prayed to every god he knew of. In that moment, Spider-Man was Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, and Sikh all at once.

But nothing happened.

"Peter! Oh my- Jesus-"

Who was that? What was that? Maybe he wasn't dead?

He heard sobbing.

Was this death? Hell, maybe? He had to hear someone crying over him for eternity?

Wade. He remembered Wade.

He can't be dead. He had Wade.

But did he really have control over that? Maybe he was dead. He'd have no way of knowing.

"Peter, I promised your Aunt- God!"

Mr. Stark?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha... Not sure how much darker this fic will get... Hang in there, kids.


	19. Chapter Nineteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter yells at Thor.

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

Peter's right eye flew open, and he realized a thick bandage covered his left. He started panicking as he glanced around the room, which was empty except for the bed he was lying on, two chairs, and medical equipment. 

Not dead, then.

He tried to reach his hand up to touch his face, but there was a plaster cast around his entire right arm. Looking across his body, he realized that there were bandages all over him. He had been seriously hurt; he had an IV and a heart monitor.

And then the adrenaline from waking up in an unknown place wore off, and the pain set in, dull and thudding, across his entire body. Every muscle was sore, and it hurt to breathe. Peter wondered if he had a broken rib or two.

And he was hungry. Really, really hungry.

He sucked in a breath and yanked the IV out of his arm. Peter began disconnecting himself from the heart monitor and the other equipment, and he stumbled to his feet. Spider-Man was dizzy and disoriented, but he could walk.

”Mr. Parker, I would not recommend walking at this time. You have suffered many traumatic injuries.” Jarvis’s voice rung out through the quiet room.

Peter gritted his teeth. At least now he knew where he was. ”Jarvis, ” he said hoarsely. ”Tell me where everyone is. Wade, and Mr. Stark, and everyone. Give me their locations.”

”Apologies, sir, but you are not currently authorized to have access to the other Avengers’ locations.”

”I need to know where Wade is, at least. Deadpool.” Peter’s side hurt.

”Deadpool left the compound three days ago. I do not know their location at this time.” The AI’s voice was flat.

”How long... How long have I been unconscious?” Peter said nervously.

”Three days and ten hours, sir.”

What? It had felt like two minutes.

”Fine. Take me down to the kitchen, then. Anywhere where I can get food and water. And what time is it?” The sun was either rising or setting; Peter couldn't tell which.

”It is currently seven-forty-six, AM. Open the door, turn left, and enter the elevator.”

Spidey limped out of his room and sagged against the railing on the elevator. Wade left. Either the Avengers kicked them out, or they just left. They left him. They were gone, and he couldn't fall into their arms and cry.

He was crying now.

He shoved the heels of his hand across his cheek and shuffled into the kitchen when the elevator doors opened. Blissfully, no one was there, so he felt free to dig through the leftovers and drink as much water as he wanted without the unwarranted stares and attention.

Spider-Man wondered if he still had two eyes when his hand brushed over the bandage.

”Jarvis, ” he said softly. ”Tell me if anyone is coming.”

”I apologize, sir. Thor is about to enter.”

Sure enough, the elevator doors opened, and the God strode out for an early morning breakfast.

”Peter! Ah, so glad you're awake. How are you feeling, lad?” The Thunder God smiled at him.

Normally, Spider-Man would’ve cried to have met Thor. He would've felt like it wasn't real, and he would’ve felt like he was really an Avenger now.

This wasn't a normal situation.

”Where’s Wade?” He asked, his voice rough and dangerous.”Did you kick them out?”

Thor’s eyes widened in surprise. ”Peter, Wade left on his --their-- own accord. They seemed upset, but I don't-”

”Don’t fucking lie to me.” Spider-Man almost flinched at the curse word that came out of his mouth.

”Peter, you’re obviously upset-”

”God! Leave me alone.” A tear rolled down his cheek. ”Leave!” He cried after Thor stood staring.

Thor looked baffled and turned and left.

Once he was gone, Peter broke down. They left. They left him.

They left him.

”Jarvis, ” he sniffed. ”Take me back to my room. And I need a cell phone and a laptop.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned.


	20. Chapter Twenty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter makes an important phone call and learns which Avengers are gay.

Peter thought he would've needed his hacker skillset to find Wade’s number. Instead, he found it quickly on Craigslist.

_Heya, baby, lookin’ for some blood? I'm your new bestie. Hit me up & I’ll blow off some lucky kid’s nutsack for ya, long as ya gimme those dead presidents. I'll also do blowjobs, if ya ask nice. ;)_

Peter was slightly appalled, but he dialed the number into the phone. His finger hovered over the call button.

He’d press call, and then he'd talk to Wade. Easy.

Except he couldn't press call. Maybe they left for a reason. Maybe he wasn't good enough. Perhaps this was a way of breaking it off.

He pressed call. It rang twice.

”Famous Joe’s House of Chicken and Meth! You kill ’em, we grill ’em! What can I do for ya, champ?” Peter was silent.

”Fuck. It ain't fun anymore. This is Deadpool, the most infamous merc in North America. What can I do for ya today?”

Peter let out a shaky breath. It was Wade.

”Hello? Anyone there?” They asked, confused.

”Wade...” he whispered.

”Jesus, Peter! I'm sorry, I’m so fucking-”

”You left!” Peter was sobbing again. ”Why the fuck would you leave?”

”I couldn't stand to be there, baby, please, I-”

”Don’t call me that.”

”Fuck, Peter, I’ll come back, I can explain. Please, babe- Peter, sorry. I fucked up, I know. Just please, please let me back to talk to you.”

Spider-Man steeled himself, trying to slow his crying. ”Come back tomorrow. I need today. Give me today.”

”Anything, ” was Deadpool’s response. ”I’ll see you tomorrow, Peter.”

”Bye.”

”I lo-” Peter hung up before the merc could finish that sentence.

”Jarvis, what would be best for me right now?”

”Physically, sir, I would recommend rest. However, it may be more beneficial for you to speak with someone you trust because you have suffered intense emotional trauma. Social interaction may alleviate much of your emotional pain.” The AI said calmly.

”Tell Mr. Stark I’m looking for him.”

”Of course, sir.”

Peter sat on his bed. ”Jarvis, ” he asked again. ”Is Thanos dead?”

”No, ” the AI responded. ”However, the Avengers destroyed one infinity stone and are in possession of another. Thanos is subdued, and Mr. Stark does not expect him back for a while.”

”Oh, thank God.” Spidey flopped back on the mattress.

”Mr. Parker, ” the AI said. ”Mr. Stark is expecting you in Common Room A. Please leave your room and proceed to the elevator.”

In the elevator, Peter realized he wanted the meeting to include more than just Tony. ”Jarvis, call T’challa, Wanda, and Vis- oh, is Vision here? If he is, call and tell them all to meet in Common Room A.”

”Vision is alive, and in the compound, sir. I will call all three now.”

He limped out again, and Tony’s face lit up when he saw him.

”Peter! How are you feeling? C’mere.”

Peter almost cried when the billionaire pulled him into a hug. Stark never showed this much affection. It hurt his sore ribs, but he didn't care. Tony pulled back and smiled at him, ruffling his hair gently.

”You look like you've aged ten years, Pete. You look so much older. Christ.”

”I feel it, ” Spider-Man said. ”Did I lose my eye?”

Tony frowned. ”Yeah... Sorry about that. Maybe you and Thor can be buddies? With the eye patches?”

Peter almost laughed. ”I fucked that up. I yelled at him earlier.”

”What? Peter! A bad word?” Tony gasped, only half kidding.

”I’m eighteen, Tony.”

”I know-”

”I’m not the kid I was before I turned to fucking ash. Don't expect me to be that, Tony. I thought I was dead twice in a week.”

”I’m sorry, Peter.”

He said it like they were equals. Peter was elated. Tony had always been condescending to him; he was always the worst when it came to talking down to Peter. But now, it was different.

”Look, I heard about you and Deadpool, and I’m not sure you know who they are-”

T’challa came through the doors of the elevator. Perfect timing.

”Peter, hello. I hope you are feeling better. Good morning, Mr. Stark. This is the perfect time to say that this will be my last day here. My people need me back in Wakanda."

"I understand, T'challa," Stark replied politely. "Peter and I were just talking about how he's in a relationship with Deadpool."

Spider-Man raised an eyebrow at Tony, annoyed. "I think it was just you who brought that up."

"Well, either way, Peter, what I was trying to say, was: I wouldn't trust them. Latching onto someone in the hell you were in makes some sense, but do you honestly think that they'll stay loyal-"

"Mr. Stark," T'challa interrupted. "It is certainly interesting that you say such a thing, especially after your obvious 'fling' with Steve Rogers. I believe you are speaking from personal heartbreak rather than what you really think is best for Peter. If I were you, I would retract my previous statements." The Black Panther smiled subtly.

"Wha- how did you-" Tony gawked at him.

"Perhaps I am more perceptive than others, but I do live halfway around the world from your compound."

Peter was shocked. Tony had a thing with Steve? How many other Avengers were gay?

"Tony?" Peter asked, and couldn't help smirking the tiniest bit. "Is this true?"

"Well- Peter- it wasn't... Christ. Yeah. For a couple of months. He's with Bucky, now." Tony was uncomfortable.

"Why are you talking shit about me and Wade, honestly? Jesus. I need some water." Peter wandered over to a water fountain and took a long drink. The elevator opened again and Wanda and Vision arrived.

"So how many other Avengers are gay?" Peter asked.

"What?" Wanda said, confused.

Tony sighed. "Thor is as straight as an arrow. So is Ant-Man, Bruce, Wanda, and Vision, I think."

"That's not true," Vision said. "I'm heteroflexible."

"I'm straight," Wanda said.

"Shit, Bruce is straight, but the Hulk is asexual," Tony added. "Thank God. T'challa, you're straight, yeah?"

T'challa grinned. "No. Bisexual."

"Jesus. Okay, Clint is straight," Tony said. "I think that's everyone who's straight. Steve is bi, and Bucky is gay, right? Natasha is super into girls, so maybe she's bi? Loki is really gay. He's genderfluid, I think, and gay."

"And you?" Peter asked, very much enjoying this.

"I don't know. Not straight." Tony said.

Everyone moved to sit back down after their discussion. A silent moment passed.

"Wade's coming back tomorrow," Peter blurted out. "They'll be here."

"Why did they leave?" Wanda asked quietly.

"I don't know..." Peter nearly whispered.

"I had assumed there was a fight, at first. They were so upset when they left. But you had not awoken," Vision added.

"I do not understand Deadpool," T'challa said slowly. "But I like them. They are good for you, Peter, and you are good for them. I hope you both find a way to make whatever you have going work out."

There was no way Spider-Man was crying over that. No way.

"I'm sorry I misjudged it, Peter." Tony's shifted in his chair. "I really am. It just doesn't seem possible."

Okay, maybe he was crying a little.

"When can I see Aunt May?" Peter's voice was small. "I want to see her."

"Any time. I'll call for her now, if you want," Stark said, and asked Jarvis when Peter nodded, still thinking of Wade.


	21. Chapter Twenty-One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter visits Wade.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: gore

Peter’s reunion with his Great Aunt was nothing like he had expected. The woman had run up to him and hugged him, tearful, of course, but Peter’s eye was dry. Aunt May was telling him about how she missed him so much and how he worried her, but Spider-Man felt numb and dazed.

By the time she left, Peter felt dizzy and sick. He realized his wounds were draining him, so he scarfed down a quick dinner and retreated to his temporary room.

Spider-Man was glad that Aunt May had been willing to let him stay in the compound for now. He was still sore all over, for one thing, and, for another, being around Aunt May would be much too exhausting for him to handle at this point.

Spidey vaguely wondered what would happen with school. He realized had missed his own graduation and all of his finals, and it was well into the summer at this point. He couldn't find it within himself to care.

He closed his eyes, but couldn’t seem to fall asleep. He thought about praying before he thought he was about to die. He remembered Tony’s distress with he dissolved into ash. The pain he felt now was nothing compared to the agony he felt just as he awoke after dissolving then.

Peter started crying for possibly the third time today, but then the phone Jarvis had given him rang.

He stared at it again, knowing exactly who it was, and it rang again.

The phone only had one contact. He sighed and wiped the tear from his remaining eye.

He let it ring a third time, and then snatched it up and answered.

“Peter... thank God-“ Wade’s voice sounded strained.

“Are you okay?” Peter asked, worried.

“I-fuck- ow- I got a bit of a- f-flesh wound. I owed s-some guy- fuck that hurts- a lotta money. C-can you just- ahh- please come and r-reattach s-s-some body parts-s?” Deadpool groaned.

“Oh my god. Oh my god, yeah. Can you text me the address? I’ll be there.”

Wade grunted an affirmative, and Peter went as quickly as he could to find a Spider-Man suit that wasn’t torn to near shreds. He pulled it on tightly, and limped out of the compound to call a cab, as he was in way too much pain to swing around the city.

He waited for a cab on a bench by the street. Logically, Spidey knew Wade couldn’t die. His mind knew that the merc had an amazing healing factor, and they could heal from anything. But if they had called him to reattached their body parts, it couldn’t be good.

The cab pulled up to the curb.

“Spider-Man!” The driver gave him a grin. “It is an honor. But I must ask, why are you not swinging around the city?” The man had an Indian accent.

“Look, I really need to get to this address. I wish I could chat.” Spidey rattled off the address as he got in the backseat.

“I had Mr. Pool in this cab only a few days ago! So you are my second superhero.” The man seemed proud.

“Deadpool? That’s who I need to find!” Peter sat up. The cab started, and the man’s foot seemed to be made of lead as it pressed on the gas. The car lurched uncomfortably forward. 

“Mr. Pool gave me the same address, actually! You will find them there, yes.”

Spider-Man winced at every sharp turn on the drive. He was sure his ribs had been broken. The man kept rambling about Deadpool and how cool they were, and it was really getting old. Peter was glad when the cab jolted to a stop.

He handed the man some money and moved to get out of the cab.

“Thank you! Mr. Pool never pays!” The driver said happily.

“They don’t- ah. I’ll talk to them about that.” Peter grumbled.

“Take care!” The man was grinning. “And oh, are the rumors true?” 

Spidey stopped and turned around. “What rumors?”

“That you and Mr. Pool are dating, of course!”

He froze. How-

“Thank you, Mr. Spider-Man! Be a good boyfriend to Mr. Pool!” The man drove away.

Good God.

Peter turned his attention to the broken-down house in front of him. He climbed the stairs and entered the door, opening it slowly.

The stench of blood hit him, and he gagged at the shear amount of it, on the walls, the floors, the ceiling, even. He heard a moan, and his heart shattered. Peter ran towards the sound, trying to ignore the worry eating away at his stomach.

“Wade- Oh God-“ His stomach twisted at the pieces of his partner littered on the floor.

Their head was on one end of the room, attached to a chunk of their torso and one arm. One leg was at the other far corner of the room, with the rest of their torso attached to it. The other leg seemed to be nowhere to be found.

“Petey!” Wade said, and gave him a tired smile before passing out.

Spider-Man swallowed back the bile in his throat and began piecing his partner back together. The blood made awful squelching sounds, but he tried to be methodical about the process.

He threw up once. It was the pain he felt, and the smell of the blood, and Wade being unconscious on the floor.

After he moved Deadpool to the threadbare couch, he mopped up some blood on the floor next to it for a place to sit.

He looked up at his unconscious lover and wanted to cry again. Today had been possibly the longest day of his life, and all he wanted to do was sleep. Peter sniffed and tried to relax, but his mind wouldn’t quiet.

“Wade,” he whispered. “Why would you leave? Who did this? Why, after all of this, do I still lo-“ He stopped himself abruptly. Nope. Not gonna go there.

Peter had never dreamed that he would find himself wishing he was back in the wasteland.

“God,” he muttered. “What’s wrong with me?” He cast a hard look at his passed out partner.

His face felt numb when he stood up; it was like all of the pain faded away. He rummaged around in the apartment, and realized it was Wade’s when he kept finding weapons. 

Peter took the notepad and pen he had found and jotted a simple note on the paper.

With one last look at Wade, he turned and left the healing mercenary, and called a different cab company then before. 

He sat silently on the ride back to the compound, and Peter realized he had never felt so alone.

It was only when he closed his eyes to go to sleep that night that the tears came.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha... I’ve been really mean to you guys lately, haven’t I?


	22. Chapter Twenty-Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Wade wakes up and reads their note.
> 
> Wade's point of view

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BIG Trigger Warning: Suicide & Self-Loathing
> 
> Please stay safe. PM me if you're unsure if you can handle this & I'll give more details. This is an intense scene.

I awoke disoriented, and the boxes were blissfully silent. I quickly determined that I was in my own, blood-covered apartment, and relaxed as I remembered what had happened.

Peter! Where was my boyfriend?

"Petey!" I called out, but to no avail. I pouted. He left me?

 _It's fitting_ , Yellow snarled. _You left him, he returns the favor._

Oh. Nice to hear you again. Glad you're back.

I scanned the room, looking for any signs of what had happened, and my eyes rested on a notepad and pen on the kitchen counter. C'mon Deadpool. Just limp right over there, and... Got it. My good arm propped my head on the countertop as I read it.

_We need a break. Don't call me.  
-Peter_

His slanted handwriting broke me. I frantically searched the paper for anything, anything else. I flipped it over. Nothing. I screamed in frustration and grief and anger and tossed the now crumpled wad of paper across the room.

I sank to the bloodied floor and clamped my hands over my ears. I sobbed before I realized I was crying, but the tears fell like rain.

 _You deserve it_ , Yellow growled.

 _He probably got tired of your disgusting skin,_ White added.

 _Disgusting_ , Yellow agreed.

 _You didn't deserve him_ , White said.

 _You never will_ , spat Yellow.

I know. God, I already know.

I rifled through the drawers until I found what I needed. I wrapped my hands around the cold metal and jammed the barrel up my mouth.

I love you.

I hate myself. I've done this many times before. It never works.

 _Do it, coward_ , White cackled.

I thought of Peter when I squeezed the trigger, and everything went out with a bang.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things will get better! This fic had gotten so damn sad.


	23. Chapter Twenty-Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter laughs and Wade gets drunk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: mentions of suicide, self-hatred, & dysphoria, alcohol

Peter wasn’t sure what day it was.

What had felt like weeks had dragged on, and the only notion of time passing had been his healing ribs.

That’s not true. Tony had come in with food, Natasha had tried to get him to talk, and Steve had attempted to be a father figure. Peter had rejected all of them.

A knock on his door startled the boy, and he jolted out of his trance before answering: “Leave me alone.”

“Please, Peter.” Vision’s voice.

“No.”

“No one knows what happened. Was it Wade?” He asked softly. Peter didn’t answer, so he continued. “Tony wants to kill them. He’s working on an anti- regenerative weapon.”

Spider-Man sat up. “He wouldn’t.”

“He would. No one knows what happened, Peter. For all we know, they abused you,” Vision said from behind the door.

Something wrenched in Peter’s stomach.

“That’s his answer to everything! Jesus Christ! Why does he even have access to these weapons? Of course, I don’t want Wade to die! Bring Tony here. I can’t stand this.”

Vision said something, but Peter couldn't hear him. He was trying desperately not to cry again.

Another knock came on the door, and Peter said something that resembled “come in” so Tony stepped in nervously.

“Peter-“

“Shut the fuck up, Tony. You are not killing my ex, got it? Jesus. You have the weirdest dad complex I’ve ever seen!” He fumed.

Tony was silent and looked pale. Then, a small smile made its way onto the billionaire’s face. Peter was even more baffled when he started laughing.

“What- what’s so funny? I just insulted you!”

“I do have a dad complex! What the fuck?” Stark was laughing hard, and Peter couldn’t help but join.

And God, did it feel good to laugh.

“Come down to one of the common rooms, Peter,” Tony said after the laughter had died down. He put a hand on Spidey’s shoulder. “Please.”

How could he say no? “Alright.”

Tony and Peter went down towards one of the common rooms wordlessly. Peter forced his thoughts away from Wade and tried to focus on the moment.

”Who is here?” Spider-Man asked in the elevator.

”Ah... Let’s see. T’challa left. All the Guardians left. Strange left a few days ago. Fury and Maria Hill were gone the day we got you out. So it's just Steve, Bucky, Wanda, Vision, Natasha, Bruce... And Thor. Thor never left.” Tony hummed thoughtfully, and the elevator doors opened to reveal Steve and Bucky in an... Interesting position. Bucky dashed off of Steve quickly, leaving the other super soldier lying on the leather couch, red-faced.

”Oh my God, get a room!” Tony complained. ”Christ.”

”S-sorry-” stuttered Steve, getting up quickly and wiping invisible dirt from his pants.

”Or you could join us, ” Bucky winked, and it was Tony’s turn to blush.

”Um, hi, guys. I'm here. Please spare my eyes.” Peter couldn't help but grin.

”Right!” Tony squeaked. ”Bucky was just joking. Obviously.”

”Well-” Bucky started but stopped when Steve shot him a glare. "Oh yes. Joking. Of course." He winked again.

Peter was laughing and happy, though, through the awkwardness, and he realized he hadn't felt this good in a long time. When he went to sleep later that night, he resolved to forget about Wade Wilson and to spend more time with his friends.

That, he reasoned, was the best way to heal.

 

 

* * *

 

Wade's Point of View

I was drunk again.

It was the only thing that made the voices shut up beside shooting myself in the head, and that really does get old after a while. So, I was content to drink away the memories of my angel in the hole-in-the-wall bar that I hadn't gone to since before the wasteland. The only problem was Weasel.

"God, Wade! This might be worse than fucking Vanessa!" He groaned, and I rolled my eyes. "This is like, the third night in a row. And it's been, like, a month, right? Christ. Get a hobby!"

"Two weeks," I said roughly.

"No one cares. Get over yourself. Go shoot something. Just stop thinking about that goddamn kid."

Weasel was right, but I was too stubborn and drunk to hear the reasoning.

"But he's-" I hiccuped. "So pretty, Weasel..."

"Jesus. Don't tell me you're in love with a kid you dated for a week."

"Weasel, you're the only one in this fic that makes any goddamn sense. This author is a dumbass."

"I'm the only one in New York that makes any sense, Wade. And you make even less sense whenever you talk about 'the author.'"

"I know." I put my head down on the rough wood of the bar. "No one gets it."

"No one gets what? Why you like Spider-Man?" I nodded, and he sighed. "You're gay as fuck."

"No shit." I giggled, feeling dizzy from the alcohol. "More whiskey," I demanded.

"Only because you're invincible. You'd be dead if you were a normal person."

"I miss him," I blubbered, not really listening to Weasel.

"Call him, dickhead."

"He told me not to."

"Christ, since when has that stopped you?" Weasel muttered. "Fine, pay him a visit. Write him a letter, you sap, anything to get you to quit crying on my bar."

Huh, I was crying. Hadn't noticed.

"Okay. I'll go now-" I moved to get up, but Weasel grabbed my arms.

"No way, José. The least attractive thing you could do right now is to stagger up to the fucking Avengers compound at four in the morning, desperate enough to-"

"Okay. I see your point." Jesus, I was a wreck. I took a long drink of the disgusting whiskey and felt better. No boxes tonight.

"What are you gonna say?"

"I don't like having plans. I don't wanna think about it," I responded.

"Have you tried a quick fuck?" Weasel asked casually.

"I don't think I could handle it."

"Why, because of your boy toy?"

"I'm his."

"God, you're dramatic," Weasel groaned. "I hate when you're all poetic-drunk after a breakup, but this is even worse because it's been so long."

"Two weeks," I murmured again and took another long drink. "I need him. I've been listening to Dion for the whole time."

"Happy Dion or dramatic Dion?"

" _Runaround Sue, Lonely World, Born to Cry_ , and _Little Diane_."

"God, you're in deep."

"I know." I did know. Christ.

Weasel poured me another drink without me asking, and said slowly, "Wade, you didn't answer me before. Are you in love?"

"Well," I said. "I have the worst commitment issues, horrible body image, self-esteem problems, and regular dysphoria and self-loathing."

He looked at me strangely. "So that's a no, then?"

"Weasel," I started, and the tears fell again. "I'm so in love. I never thought I could be, but all I want is him."

He stared at me as I drank. "You're not afraid of hurting him? I remember you being terrified of hurting V."

My teeth ground together. "I would never hurt him. I'd find a way to kill myself before I did."

"Wade, don't say that."

"It's true. We both know it's true."

He turned away. "We both know you're crazy and suicidal, but I don't like talking about it."

"Only suicidal these past few weeks," I lied.

"Shut the fuck up. Don't you dare lie to me like that." He sounded more tired than angry.

"Sorry." Weasel was silent for a moment.

"Go to your princess tomorrow. I can't deal with you tonight. I'm closing up."

" 'Kay. Goodnight, Weas." I staggered off of the stool and limped my way back to my apartment, where I collapsed onto my mattress.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wade's "Playlist" so far:
> 
> Single Ladies by Beyonce  
> Sweet Home Alabama by Lynyrd Skynyrd  
> I Wanna Hold Your Hand by the Beatles  
> Light it Up (Ft. Nyla & Fuse ODG) by Major Lazer
> 
> For the break-up:  
> Runaround Sue  
> Lonely World  
> Born to Cry  
> Little Diane  
> (All by Dion)
> 
>  
> 
> In case any of you cared enough to listen :)


	24. Chapter Twenty-Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Wade visits the Avengers compound and takes a hostage.
> 
> Wade's point of view

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The only warning I have for this chapter is for the feelings.

I hardly ever wake up early. (What can I say? I need my beauty sleep.) But that's precisely what I did that day.

I took a hot shower to soothe my aching skin and toweled off, avoiding the mirror. I should take that damn thing down.

 _But what if Peter comes back?_   White said, oddly hopeful. I ignored her and brushed my teeth.

I was feeling better when I pulled on my Deadpool gear. Deadpool was attractive and funny, and witty and energetic. Wade was a monster, depressed, and lethargic. Being Deadpool again made me feel more myself.

I sheathed my katanas and decided to walk. A cab driver would be invasive, and I didn't want to share my most profound thoughts with anyone but my shawty and Weasel.

 _Free therapy, though_ , White quipped.

Where’s Yellow?

 _Napping_ , she answered. _He's a slob._

I'd take you to that idiot any day, White. I felt her glowing proudly.

It was a long walk to the compound, and that was unfortunate. At least the stares I got on the street weren't out of disgust, and more awe.

And then I was there. Holy shit. The compound loomed over me, all menacing. I felt so small in its shadow, knowing my boy was in there.

Fuck. There’s no way the Avengers would let me in. No way in hell. But, like the dumbass I am, I walked right into the lobby.

It always seemed like reporters were crawling in the place. I hate the compound. It's the hub. There's no privacy.

The reporters swarmed me immediately, asking why I was here and was it to see my boyfriend, Spider-Man? Were the rumors true? I just reached back for my katana, and they got spooked, backing off with my wicked grin.

Ha.

I went right to the elevator, and security tried to stop me, but I shoved them away and drew a gun. Someone said something about the cops being on the way, but everything was a blur.

I walked right up to the front desk, my gun still locked on the useless security team, and drew Bea, my katana. I pointed her tip right at the frazzled secretary.

”Take me up. Take me to the Avengers. Now.”

With my hostage, I made it to the elevator, Bea pressing just slightly into her throat. I grinned at her nervous expression, and up we went in the lift.

I released her but took her phone so she couldn't call anyone.

”You ain't gon’ die, baby. Don't worry. Spidey wouldn't approve.” She gawked at me. ”Close your mouth, sweets --you’ll catch flies.”

Jarvis came on. ”Mr. Wilson, my apologies, you do not have clearance to enter the upper levels of the compound.”

Of course I didn't. ”How far up can ya get me, sport?” I asked the AI.

”The thirtieth floor, sir. It functions as a lobby for those waiting to obtain clearance.”

”That’s the bitch. Take me there.” I grinned. ”All according to plan --what’s your name?” I looked at the terrified woman next to me.

”S-Sarah!”

”Christ, re-lax, Sarah, I already told ya, Spidey wouldn't want me to shoot ya.” I leaned on the elevator wall casually until the doors opened. Sarah booked it away from me, all the way to the end of the nicely furnished room. I wandered in slowly, taking it all in.

”Jar-Jar, tell Spidey I wanna see him.” I snorted at my own stupid Star-Wars reference.

”Right away, sir. For future reference, my name is Jarvis.”

”For future reference, ” I responded snarkily. ”I’m not a man.”

”My apologies, Ms. Wilson. I will keep that in mind.”

”No! Oh, fuck it-”

I was cut off by Tin Man stepping out of the elevator like he owned the place. Well, he did, but who cares?

”Deadpool-” he started, but I cut him off.

”Yo, my man, ’fore we get into feelings, lets address that your dumbass AI keeps misgendering me. Can we get that fixed? Cool. Thanks.”

Tony looked exhausted. ”Maybe later. For now, you are absolutely not welcome here. I can't let Peter-” I lunged at him, landing an uppercut to his jaw.

”Can’t let him make his own decisions? Is that what you were gonna say?” I snarled and grabbed his throat, choking him slightly. I released him quickly, realizing what I had done.

 _You fucked up, Wade_ , White whispered.

”You’re unstable,” Stark said bitterly, after rubbing his bruised jaw. ”You’d only hurt him again.”

Ouch. That one hurt.

”I know. But I don't want Daddy Stark telling him what to do. I want him to tell me himself.”

”You’re a monster, ” Stark growled at me. ”You’re just gonna break his heart.”

”And you have reverse Daddy issues!” I was yelling now. ”Look, Tin Can, I came all the way here to talk with my boy-”

”Your boy? Wade-”

”To talk with my boy like a rational person-”

”You just took my secretary hostage.”

”Like a rational person, and all I'm asking for is an answer from Peter. Not from you, or either of your boyfriends-”

”They aren't- how did you-”

”But from Peter. I want him to tell me what he feels. Is that so bad?” I finished.

Tony paused.

”Besides, ” I remarked. ”The readers are probably dying for some more Spideypool action. I mean, this author is a real cock-block and-”

”You’re insane, ” Tony said slowly. ”But I think I'm even crazier for letting you do this.”

I squealed. ”Yesssss time to bring my baby back, baby back-”

”But, ” he said. ”It has to be supervised.”

”Motherfucking, cum-sucking-”

”Shut up, or I won't let you see him at all.”

My mouth snapped shut, and I gave a mock salute. I would've said ”yes, daddy, ” if I hadn't been my prince I was rescuing.

He rolled his eyes at my gesture and told me I could talk to my sweet boy in an hour if he were feeling up to it. He left and then came the wait.

I sang songs to myself and tried to keep my buzzing brain off of my shawty’s ass. I cleaned my guns. I got a rock out of my gear belt. I scrubbed at the eyes of my mask so I could see better. I counted everything in the room, twice. I sat on every chair and the leather couch multiple times and paced the room.

Then, I heard something in the elevator.

I scrambled for the couch and tried to look casual, but my heart was pounding.

 _Here he comes_ , whispered White. _Don't be weird._

I won't.

The doors opened and... Fuck. There he was. I watched him step out and look around the room with his pretty, curious eye. One was covered by a black eye patch, which oddly suited him. He looked at me, and I melted under his beautiful brown curls.

 _Sap,_ White complained, and I noticed Stark giving me a wary look.

My eyes snapped back to my boy, who was still staring at me like I wasn't real. I was too afraid to say anything, but then he took a step forward.

Oh. He's coming over here.

He kept walking forward until he was directly in front of me. Neither of us said a word when his curious hands scraped over my mask. I saw his eye turn glossy, and then I felt a sting on my cheek.

I blinked. He slapped me.

”That was for leaving, ” he said, and his voice wobbled a tiny bit.

”Fine, ” I sighed. ”I deserved that. Can we talk?” I was so nervous.

”No pet names, ” my angel reminded me as he sat on the couch beside me. I turned my body toward him and nodded.

”I don't know where to start. I fucked up a lot.” I pulled off my mask so that we were even, and Peter looked surprised at the gesture. ”Look, ” I said. ”I’m in love with you.” I heard him breathe in sharply. ”It’s the truth. I love you more than I loved V, and that doesn't make any sense, because we were only together for a week. You’re the most beautiful, insightful person I've ever met, and I’ll do whatever it takes for me not to lose you.”

 _You are a fucking sap, and you’re about to scare him away_ , White said urgently.

”Why’d you leave?” He whispered, and he looked like he was gonna cry.

I looked down. ”I couldn't take it, Peter. I can’t stand being in here, especially knowing you might be dying a floor up. No one wanted me there, Peter, I could feel the resentment. I never meant to leave you, but the truth is: I didn't know if you were gonna wake up.”

He was crying when I looked up. ”I’m so sorry-”

”Don't be. Can I touch your face?” I asked hesitantly, and he nodded.

I could feel Tony’s eyes on me as I wiped my baby’s tears away. Peter sighed and leaned into my touch, content.

His eye snapped open when he realized something. ”Tony, ” he said loudly. ”I’m taking Wade up to my room.”

Tony looked awkward. ”Peter, are you sure-”

”Tony, we’re not having sex. I just don't want to feel like you're my dad watching me with my partner.”

Tony turned red, and I couldn't help but grin.

”Your partner?” I whispered as we were getting up.

”I’ve missed you, ” he said, as a way of an explanation, and grabbed my hand.

Tony had already left, and my heart was soaring as my angel led me into the elevator again. He pulled me into his room and shut the door.

”Jarvis, lock the door.” He smiled shyly at me.

”Of course, sir, ” the AI responded, and we could hear the bolt sliding in place.

I stared at my boy in awe as he put his head on my chest and wrapped his arms around me. Holy shit. I pulled his tiny figure closer and ran my hands over his back. He shivered at the touch, so my left hand traveled to his hair and ruffled it before I kissed the top of his head. He smelled so good.

”Look at you, angel, ” I murmured near his ear. ”Gorgeous.”

He was nearly purring, and I guided him over to his bed and spooned him. I kissed his cheek and put my hand on his stomach, and he hummed happily.

”You’re all I want, ” I said lowly. ”When you were gone, my friend kept telling me to hire a quick fuck to get you outta my mind.” I felt him squirm, uncomfortable. ”I couldn't do it. Baby, you don't understand. I used to be always down for quick sex. You’ve spoiled me, and we haven't even made love.” I joked, and it got a laugh out of him.

”Soon, ” he said, smiling, and my dick jumped at that.

”Soon?” I repeated. ”Baby Boy, you don't have to-”

”Wade, I want to. Just not right now. Soon.” Holy fucking shit.

”No, ” I said. ”We’re gonna do this the right way. I’mma take you on dates first. We’ll go nice and slow, okay? No rush, baby. We’ve got all the time in the world.”

He paused. ”I thought you wanted to.”

”I do, dear God, angel, I do, it's just that you're more important to me than my dick. You deserve to be taken slowly. I don't wanna rush it.”

”Kiss me.”

I obliged, turning him onto his back on the bed and hovering over him. His hands migrated to my chest, and I kissed him deeply and hungrily because this is all I had wanted for the past weeks.

I pulled back and looked far into his blown-out pupils.

”I love you, too, ” he whispered, and my heart melted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally...


	25. Chapter Twenty-Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter and Wade eat pancakes.

Peter awoke in Wade’s arms. He hadn't remembered falling asleep.

”Morning, Wade, ” he whispered, not intending to wake the merc up. He only wanted to feel those words on his tongue again.

Yesterday had been a blur, and now everything felt right again. He was safe in his partner’s arms. He turned to press a kiss to Wade’s cheek, and his lover stirred.

”Mm. Angel? Morning.” they smiled and pressed their lips to his while pulling him tighter against them.

Wade sat up on the bed, and Peter put his head on their lap. The merc played with his hair fondly, and Spider-Man realized they still had their Deadpool suit on.

”Wade, do you want to change?”

”This is okay, for now. I took out my katanas and guns before I went to sleep. Figured you’d appreciate that.” They grinned.

”Yeah, ” Peter agreed. ”No weapons in bed.”

”Unless you’re into that, Angel.” Wade winked.

”Wade.” He rolled his remaining eye.

”What are you into?” The merc said, and their voice lowered. ”We never finished our discussion.”

”I thought you said you wanted to take it slow, ” Peter responded.

”Sure, but I still plan on kissing you. If you wanted me to tie you up or call me Daddy, that wouldn't have to include sex.” Wade said it so casually.

”Is that what you want?” Peter nearly whispered.

”I want what you're comfortable with, love, ” the merc replied thoughtfully. ”But that doesn't mean I would be opposed...”

”You want me to call you Daddy?” Peter pressed further, and Wade’s eyes widened at how forward their boyfriend was being.

”I- y-yeah. I absolutely do, Baby.”

”Then kiss me, Daddy.”

Wade acted immediately, lifting Peter so that he was straddling them. They pushed their lips onto him, attacking his own lower lip, biting and sucking wildly. Spider-Man wasn't even sure he had a daddy kink, but to see Wade react this way was enough for him.

They pulled back, their eyes glossy with lust.

”Say it again, little angel.”

”Please, Daddy, ” Peter begged, and the merc kissed him again.

A knock at the door startled them both.

”Christ. I don't want to know what you guys are doing, but breakfast is happening, and Steve is in a pancake mood. We have way too many. Please eat them. They’re taking over.” Tony said from behind the door. ”Get dressed and come down, for God’s sake.” They heard Tony curse and walk away.

Peter giggled. ”Let’s go down and eat.”

”I wouldn't want to be the cause of a pancake invasion, ” Wade laughed and kissed his nose.

Peter’s heart was happy when Wade pulled on one of his oversized sweatshirts and sweatpants instead of wearing their Deadpool gear and mask. The sweatshirt fit them perfectly, and the pants were tight in all the right places.

Peter put on a sweater because of how cold the AC was in the mornings, and he grasped his partner’s hand tightly on their walk down to breakfast. They kissed in the elevator, and Spider-Man was blushing when the doors opened.

”Peter, Wade.” Steve noticed them first from the stovetop, cooking pancakes. ”Morning.”

Peter smiled, and Wade ran a finger over his palm.

Bucky was very close to Steve, leaning near him and touching his shoulder gently. ”Oh, yeah, hey guys.” He smiled at the couple.

Tony was sitting at a table nearby, sipping coffee. Thor was across from him, and Natasha was with Bruce, talking amiably near the countertop. Peter looked at Wade and grinned.

”I’m hungry, Wade.”

”Me too, babe. Let's get some griddle cakes, yeah?”

Peter let Wade lead him to the growing mountain of pancakes. The two of them got their food and sat between Thor and Tony.

”Ah, I suppose you two had an exciting night!” Thor clapped Wade on the back, much too hard, and they lurched forward, almost into their pancakes.

”Christ, big guy, lay off, ” Wade complained. ”And no, we’re taking things slow.”

Tony perked up. ”Good for you!”

”Okay, dad, ” Wade muttered.

”Thanks, Tony, ” Peter supplied before digging into his syrupy food. Wade ate, too, but mostly they watched Peter happily.

”How’s the patch holding up, young Peter?” Thor asked, smiling widely.

”Its perfect, Thor, thank you. It hasn't come off at all.” Spider-Man ran a finger lightly over his eye patch.

”I love it, ” Wade said quietly in his ear. ”It looks good on you.” Peter blushed. Tony grumbled.

”Tony!” Steve scolded. ”Stop tormenting them.” The effect was immediate, and Tony turned red. Wade rolled their eyes.

”Tony, Jesus. Get your feelings straightened out. We all can see them, but you're acting like more of a teenager about this than Peter.” Natasha bemoaned.

Silence followed. Tony was blushing even more now, and Steve looked at him strangely.

”Steve, Bucky, ” Tony said softly. ”Can I talk to you two? Privately?” Bruce took over the pancakes, and the three men left the room.

”What on Midgard-” Thor started.

”Relax, jacked-up Chris Hemsworth, ” Wade said confidently. ”They’ll come back and be in a big, happy, poly ’lationship. Ain't nothing wrong with that. And Tony’ll start actin’ like an adult again.”

”Wade, I do not understand. Three people in a relationship?” Thor looked utterly baffled.

”S’called polyamory, muscles. Imagine having two women who are cool with and know ’bout each other.”

Thor was thoughtful, and Natasha giggled at something Bruce said. Peter rubbed his partner’s arm affectionately.

”Baby Boy, how long am I stayin’ here for?” Wade asked softly. ”Should I get some clothes?”

”Umm... I don't know. What do you wanna do? I'm okay with you staying for a few days.” Spider-Man said.

”Okay, angel!” Wade smiled.

”I wanna patrol, though. I haven't been in so long. Will you come with me?” Peter asked shyly.

”Of course!” Deadpool messed up his hair. ”I’d love to patrol with you. Just like old times, yeah?” Peter nodded, content. ”I’ll take you out on a real date tonight, too, ” Wade added. ”Whaddya think?”

Peter beamed, the skin around his eye wrinkled with his grin. ”Yes!” he couldn't contain his excitement.

"Adorable," Wade said sweetly, and they grabbed Peter's hand and led him back to the elevator after placing their empty dishes in the sink.

"Look at you," The merc said happily, while caressing Peter's cheeks in the elevator. "Gorgeous. Mine."

Peter blushed again. "Yours," he said breathlessly, and Wade kissed him hard and passionately. The elevator doors opened, and Deadpool picked the boy up effortlessly in a princess hold. Spider-Man giggled and swung his feet, and his partner kissed him again.

"Mine," they repeated, like they couldn't believe this was real.

"Yours, Daddy," Peter said shyly, and Wade sucked in a breath. They kicked the door open and tossed their boyfriend unceremoniously onto the mattress.

"Jarvis," Wade said. "Close and lock the door."

"Right away, Ms. Wilson."

Peter looked at them curiously. "I’ll tell you later," Deadpool said, and took off their sweatshirt in one fluid motion.

Peter watched from the bed, his eye locked on Wade's bare chest. "Eye up here, shawty," they grinned, and Peter blushed again.

"This okay, prince?" The merc said, taking a seat near Peter on the bed.

"Yeah." The boy let Wade take complete control. The merc sat on the side of the bed and pulled Spidey over so that he was straddling them. Peter loved the access he had to Wade's neck and chest, and he ran his hands up and down their muscled abdomen, taking in their chiseled form.

"Feel something you like, Tiger?" Wade teased, but it was only to see their boyfriend blush. "Will you let me take your shirt off, Angel?" Peter nodded, and Wade put his arms up and pulled the fabric off of his body. The boy was slightly aroused by how in control Wade was of the whole thing. He loved the feeling of his clothes being taken off for him.

Deadpool's tongue flicked over his nipple, jolting him back to reality.

"Wade..." His voice was strained.

"Tell me what you need."

"I just-" Peter searched desperately for words. "I'm yours, I'm all yours right now, just please..."

"You want me to decide what you want." Of course Wade understood, of course they did, perfectly-

"Yes."

His partner hummed. "Say it nicely and I'll do it."

The teasing was getting to Peter's dick. "Please, please Daddy, I need you, I need you so-"

Wade moaned at his words and kissed his neck. They bit and sucked until they left a mark, and then focused on Peter's nipple again. Then, they detached and kissed him once more on the lips.

"I ain't goin' back on my promise, prince. We're takin' it slow. It's patrol time!"

Peter groaned and tried to relax. He took a cold shower before changing into his Spider-Man gear, and he was sure Wade noticed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some chill, domestic fluff.


	26. Chapter Twenty-Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter and Wade go on patrol.

Patrol was refreshing.

Spider-Man was showing off, maybe a little too much, doing flips and twirls in the air, fishing for his partner’s approval, and Wade clapped and cheered, happy for the show.

Peter landed, breathing hard, and Wade hugged him tightly on the roof of a building. 

”You’re so sexy! Flipping through the air like that? Wow! Hot damn!” Wade was grinning and talking excitedly. They touched Peter’s shoulder with on finger, and then pulled it back, pretending it burned them.

Spider-Man laughed and lifted his mask to his nose. Deadpool lifted theirs, too, and they kissed happily. It wasn't hot and steamy, but it was content and passionate all the same.

Spidey pulled away reluctantly. 

”Wade, do you want to hold onto me as I swing? We’d be much faster that way.” He pushed his mask back down so the merc couldn't see his blush.

”Um, obviously!” Wade pushed their mask down, too. ”How is that even a question?”

”Here.” Peter helped his partner onto his back. Wade was heavy, but Spider-Man was confident enough to shoot the first web out. He jumped and Deadpool gasped in excitement and held tighter to their boyfriend.

Peter gradually became more comfortable with the new weight on his back, even though they were distracting. He began flipping and moving faster, just to feel Wade’s breath quicken next to his ear, and their arms tighten around him.

”Baby, holy shit, this is fun!” Wade crowed, and the two of them noticed New York staring up at them and taking pictures. Instead of being embarrassed, Peter swung low, right over people’s heads.

They landed on a building. Wade stared at him after climbing off of his back.

”Baby Boy, that was incredible.”

Peter laughed, but he knew what the merc was getting at. It was still exhilarating to swing through the city, even after everything that had happened, even after he had done it countless times. 

”Does it get old?” Wade asked, still smiling from the adrenaline.

”No. It never-” Spider-Man stopped when he heard sirens. ”Duty calls. C’mon, Wade.”

Deadpool latched onto their boyfriend’s back again and Peter swung them quickly to the crime scene. It was a simple robbery, nothing Peter hadn't dealt with before. The criminal had broken into someone's apartment, and they must have a gun, because the police were wary and waiting outside.

Spider-Man landed on the roof, and the police were shouting things about the suspect. The couple learned that it was a woman, and she had a gun.

Wade hopped off of Peter’s back, and kissed him on the cheek through both of their masks. The two of them went in through open windows into a bedroom. The robber was shocked to see them, but she raised her gun at Spider-Man.

Instead, Wade jumped and kicked her in the jaw, a little too forcefully for Peter’s taste, but he understood. It was different when someone was threatening your partner.

Wade grabbed her groaning body and dragged her out of the building, Spidey following close behind. The police thanked them, but Peter could see that Wade was feeling uncomfortable, so he grabbed his partner and webbed them out.

They landed safely on a building.

”What’s wrong?” Peter asked Deadpool.

”I don't like cops, ” they responded hesitantly.

”Me neither, ” Spider-Man admitted. ”I just don't know where else to turn the criminals in.”

Wade shrugged. ”Did I do good?”

”Yeah.” Peter smiled at them from under his mask. ”What time is it?”

Deadpool pulled their glove to reveal an adventure time wrist watch. ”Four! I gotta get you back for our date!”

”Don’t you need clothes?”

”Yeah. Babe, you should go back to the compound and get ready. Nothing too fancy, it's me we’re talkin’ about. I'll go to Chez Deadpool and get somethin’ to wear. Pick you up at six?” 

Peter nodded, and Wade rolled up his mask to kiss him. It was a quick peck, but it made Peter’s heart flutter just the same.

”Bye, Wade.”

Wade saluted, and Peter disappeared over the ledge of the building, swinging on his web.

”My little Spider...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Date night next chapter ;)


	27. Chapter Twenty-Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter and Wade go on a date. And maybe they have some fun afterwards.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: homophobic slurs

Peter was nervous.

He didn't know why, but his nerves buzzed and his stomach felt jostled. Spider-Man had on a dull red button down and dark pants, and he had tried to comb his hair.

The phone that Jarvis had given him lit up with a text from Wade.

_Hey baby, it read. I’m here, but I can't go up. Everyone’s jealous of my ride. I'm afraid it'll get stolen. Come on down, angel._

Peter grinned and wondered what their ”ride” was as he raced into the elevator. He punched the button for the lobby and waited impatiently, tapping his foot. The elevator opened, finally, and he raced out past the reporters to see his partner.

Wade looked good, he thought, really good. They were wearing a dark leather jacket and were slung casually over a red motorcycle, holding two helmets in one hand.

Peter walked up to them and leaned in for a kiss that Wade returned gladly.

”Hey, Angel,” Wade murmured. ”You look adorable.” They held out the helmet, and with Peter’s nod, they pushed it onto his head gently, securing the straps.

”You look nice, too, Wade, ” Spider-Man said after the helmet was tight on his head.

Was beamed. ”Have you ever been on a motorcycle before, love?” Peter shook his head. ”Get on behind me, here, like that, and get those arms around me. There you go.”

Peter grinned, and his partner gunned the engine. He burried his face behind their shoulder to ignore the stares of everyone near the lobby. His arms wound tightly around Wade’s abdomen. ”Ready, ” he said excitedly.

Wade was a fantastic driver. They sped up smoothly and weaved around cars. So much for New York traffic. Deadpool pressed some buttons on their motorcycle and a song came on.

”Daylight! I wake up feelin’ like you won't play right!” Wade sang, badly.

”Childish Gambino?” Peter asked. He didn't listen to a lot of music, but he wasn't completely uncultured.

”Too late! You wanna make it right but now it's too late!” They yelled over the sounds of traffic. ”My peanut-butter chocolate cake with Kool-Aid!”

Peter felt the wind wrapping around him, and he held tighter to his singing partner. He smiled at Wade’s attempt at Gambino’s high voice.

”Now stay woke! N-words creepin’! They gon’ find ya! Gon’ catch ya sleepin’!”

Wade slowed the motorcycle in front of a curb, parked, and killed the engine. ”But stay woke!” they finished the song and pulled off their helmet, grinning widely at Peter. Wade helped their boyfriend with his helmet, leaning in close and undoing the strap.

”How do you listen to that much music?” Spider-Man asked, genuinely perplexed.

Wade shrugged. ”Not really sure. The author just imagines me singing constantly, and I guess I have, like, a ton of playlists?” They grabbed his hand and the two of them walked into the tiny Mexican place. Peter was proud of them for not wearing a mask or a hoodie in public, but decided not to comment.

The two of them slid into the cracked booth, and Peter tried to smooth his hair down since it got ruffled from the helmet.

Someone came by and dropped menus on the cheap table. ”You want a Corona, Deadpool?” the waiter asked in his thick Mexican accent.

”You know it, Juan. What do you want, Petey?”

Peter thought it was odd how rude the waiter was, but he responded anyway. ”I’ll have a Sprite.”

Juan left without saying anything more.

”Do you two... Know each other?” Spider-Man asked.

”I come in here all the time, angel. Everyone’s rude, but it's damn good food. Hey, that rhymed!”

Peter smiled, and Juan came back with the drinks. ”Look at the menu, dumbfuck, ” he said shortly to Wade. ”Quit looking at your boy toy.”

”I love this guy!” Wade said happily, pointing at Juan, and opened their menu. Juan huffed and left.

”Tell me, Baby Boy, ” Deadpool said as they were scanning the menu. ”Tell me something I don't know about you.”

Peter looked up from his own menu, thoughtful. He decided to be funny. ”I’m gay, ” he said, smiling.

”Me too!” Wade laughed. ”Looks like we’re made for each other.”

Peter grinned, and glanced at the menu again.

”Here, ” the merc said. ”I’ll go. I love kittens, they’re my only weakness. But I'm terrified of cows.”

”Cows?”

”Yeah, ” Deadpool shuddered. ”All the horns, and hooves, and... Stuff. Yikes. Oh, shut up, Yellow, I thought you were sleeping! Sorry, Pete, he’s being a dick right now.”

”Have you always had the voices?”

”Nah. When they fucked up my face, they fucked up my brain, too. I call ’em boxes, by the way.”

Peter looked thoughtful. ”There’s just two?”

”Yeah. White is a girl, and Yellow is the boy.”

”Does that impact your gender?” He asked calmly.

Deadpool paused. ”I don't know! That's interesting. I think I’m actually genderfluid, except my gender changes, like, every minute or so. Sometimes even faster. But there have been days when I was totally a girl, or totally a boy. So whatever! Fuck gender!”

”Fuck gender, ” Peter agreed, and Wade beamed at him.

Juan came back, and they ordered chimichangas. Peter preferred burritos.

”I like cats, too, ” Peter mused. ”I think the whole ’cat- or dog-person thing is stupid. I like both!”

”Baby, I'm sorry, but I thought I was the one who had voices in their head. What are you talking about?”

”You said you loved kittens earlier, and I couldn't figure out if I liked cats or dogs better.”

”Oh!” Wade said. ”You’re so cute.”

Spider-Man blushed in spite of himself, and Wade looked at him, and the look was... Well, it was full of love.

”I don't understand you, Petey, ” the merc said softly, but they were still looking at him like that.

”What do you mean, Wade?”

 _You don't seem to care that I've got voices_ , they signed. _You don't care about my face._

”Should I care?”

 _Yes_ , they signed. _I'm selfish, because I don't want you to care. But you should. You deserve the world._

”Wade, ” Spider-Man’s voice came out strangled, so he switched to signing, instead. _I want you, he signed. I love you._

 _I love you_ , Deadpool signed and closed their eyes happily.

Juan brought the massive plates of food out and ruined the moment with a grunt. Peter’s eyes widened.

”This is so much!”

”Yeah, ” Wade replied, their voice low.

The pair dug into their food silently, but only because it was so goddamn good.

”You we're right!” Peter said, his mouth full. ”This is amazing!” Wade smiled happily, but kept eating.

Spider-Man couldn't finish his food. This never happened. He had such a fast metabolism, with his healing factor and strength, but this was too much. Wade, apparently, had an even faster metabolism than him, and they ate all of their giant plate of food and the rest of Peter’s burritos.

The bill came, and Deadpool paid despite Peter’s protests. Spidey noticed they gave Juan a big tip.

Peter nursed his Sprite, and Wade sipped on their beer. The hero noticed it was getting sort of late; almost nine, and then his Spidey sense tingled.

”Wade, something’s wrong-”

”Fags!” came a slurred voice near the doorway. ”Look how disgusting that one-”

The brute couldn't finish his sentence before Deadpool had the man slammed up against the wall, their gun pressed to his head.

”Apologize to me and my boyfriend, ” Wade hissed, twisting the gun into the man’s head.

”I-I- fuck-”

”Wade, ” Peter ran over and touched their arm, the one clutching tightly to the gun. ”Wade, relax, it's okay, let him go.”

Deadpool stared at him, clearly torn. ”Let the asshole apologize first. Then I might let him go.” Spider-Man swallowed hard, but nodded.

”I’m sorry!” the man squeaked, trembling. ”Please don't shoot me!”

”Hmm...” Deadpool’s eyes glinted. ”Should I?”

”Wade, ” Peter started to say, but the merc dropped the man to the ground instead of shooting him.

”Time to go, ” Wade said firmly, and they wrapped an arm around their boyfriend’s waist and walked him out. ”Do you wanna go to my place? Ain’t covered in blood no more, scout’s honor.”

”Yeah, ” Peter said quietly, and his fingers glossed over his partner’s chest, exploring.

Wade smirked and put on their helmet before helping Peter with his. The two of them climbed on the motorcycle again, and Spidey took a long whiff of his partner’s scent as they rode away.

The ride was short, only five minutes or so, and Wade parked the cycle out front of the building Peter had seen before. Helmets came off once more, and Spidey wondered vaguely why Wade wore one at all. New York law, maybe; they didn't need to be pulled over every ten seconds.

Deadpool unlocked the door and the two of them went inside.

”Wanna drink, Baby?” Peter shook his head, and Wade grabbed themself a beer out of the fridge before taking off their mask. Their place wasn't as messy as Spider-Man had assumed, really. It looked like a fairly typical bachelor pad, with a decently sized TV in front of the worn couch.

Wade fiddled with a speaker, and Peter wandered over to the couch. Deadpool had an ancient-looking iPod: not quite a shuffle, but nearly so, and a folksy song began playing. Of course, Wade knew all the words, and came over to Peter, singing happily.

”Headin’ down south to the land of the pines, and I’m thumbin’ my way down to North Caroline. Starin’ up the road, pray to God I see headlights.” They didn't take their eyes off of Peter as they came closer. Spider-Man's face got hot.

Once they were closer, Wade's gloved hand thumbed carefully through their boyfriend's hair. "So rock me momma like a wagon wheel, rock me momma any way you feel. Hey, momma rock me."

Peter was having trouble breathing.

Wade surveyed his face until sitting beside Spidey on the couch. "Rock me momma like the wind and the rain, rock me momma like a southbound train..." Peter's hand explored their covered chest, and all he wanted was to be wrapped up in those toned arms again. He felt his heart ache with want.

"Hold me?" His voice cracked when he interrupted their singing. Deadpool pulled him onto their lap, gentle and slow, and Peter sighed when he felt their broad frame around his small one. Wade hummed along with the song in his ear, lowly, and it was the most comforting thing Spider-Man had ever heard. He pushed his face into the crook of his partner's neck, and it smelled like uniquely Wade, all sweat, and heavy, and strong.

"I changed my mind," they nearly growled. "I want you so bad, if you want me." Peter shivered; their words reached him to his core.

 _Bad at Love_ by Halsey came on, and Peter felt his partner smile at the irony.

"I don't know what I want," he admitted. "But right now- I-" Peter blushed, realizing what he was about to say. Wade pulled him away so they could see his face.

"What do you want?" Their eyes were dark; their were pupils blown out. Peter shifted nervously, but their hands on his hips steadied him.

"I want- I want you to hold me d-down." Peter looked as his hands, blushing.

"Fuck," Wade whispered, and tilted their boyfriend's head so that they could see his face again. "That's maybe the hottest thing you've ever said."

The knot loosened in his stomach. "Really?" Peter asked.

Instead of answering, Deadpool pushed him down onto the couch. "Peter," they said lowly. "You gotta to stop me if-if you need it. Do you understand? If you don't I'll- I'll just keep going."

Spider-Man nodded, feeling nothing but trust in his partner as he stretched out below them on the couch. Wade was staring with their mouth wide. They grabbed both of his tiny wrists in one hand and held them above his head. He shivered and tested their grip, just to feel really restrained.

Their teeth brushed over his neck, and their hands moved to try to pull off his shirt. Peter felt the buttons being undone, and his hips lifted on their own accord. Wade steadied him with gentle hands, and it was indescribable how safe he felt under them.

He let out a whine and struggled against his partner's grip; all he wanted was to touch them.

"Relax, prince, breathe, I've got you. Look at you, so pretty for me already, angel," Wade murmured, fiddling with the button on his dark jeans, and Peter preened at the attention. "God," they continued, after revealing his chest. "This never gets old." Wade began stroking his toned chest. If Peter wasn't aroused before, he certainly was now, with the way his partner looked at him, and how carefully they touched him.

Wade noticed. Peter saw their eyes widen when they saw his dick at attention through the pants. Their hand travelled lower, under the fabric, and _oh_.

"Please!" Peter was embarrassed at how urgent he was. "God..."

"I prefer Wade, but you can call me whatever with an ass like that," they smirked and wrapped their hand around his cock.

Peter gasped, and Wade shoved his pants out of the way and to his knees.

"Look at you. All for me. Mm..." Wade murmured again, pumping their hand up and down, making Peter moan. They released their grip on his hands to get a better angle. "Don't move those hands, baby boy. Don't you dare." Wade all but growled.

Peter came quickly and with a short moan after those words. After a few moments of panting, Wade grabbed a towel and cleaned him carefully, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

"I want- I want you to cum, too, Wade," Peter said softly, trying not to be embarrassed.

"Are you okay with touching me, Angel?" They hummed happily, and the boy nodded.

"Would y-you like it if... If I gave you a b-blowjob?" Spidey managed to squeak. Wade sucked in a breath.

"I'd kill for one, Angel." Deadpool's leather jacket was undone quickly, and their pants and shirt were off in a flash, and they sat on the couch. "Are you sure about this?"

"Yeah. I've just never..." Peter kneeled in front of them, trying to relax.

"It's okay. Honestly, just seeing my boy with his lips around my dick might be enough to get me off. Don't you worry about a thing, gorgeous." Wade's smile was reassuring and safe, so Peter took their length in his mouth. They were longer than he was, and he flushed in embarrassment. Their reaction, though, was almost enough to get him turned on again. Wade groaned lowly and grabbed Peter's hair.

Spider-Man swirled his tongue experimentally, and Wade's hips jolted forward slightly.

"More of that... Christ."

Peter licked the underside of their cock before popping off for a moment.

"I prefer Peter, but you can call me anything, Daddy."

Wade stared at him and gripped his hair tighter. Peter lapped at their dick again, feeling more confident. He sucked, really sucked, and Wade looked blissed out and flushed.

After a few more minutes, Wade came unceremoniously into his mouth. Peter tried, he really tried to swallow it all, but some of it dribbled down his chin. He couldn't tell if he was grossed out or turned on when his partner licked their own cum off of his face.

Wade picked up Peter's naked body easily and took him to their bed. Spider-Man slid under the covers, and Wade climbed in after him, spooning him and holding him tightly.

Peter fell asleep faster than he ever had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This update took a while but it's really long so forgive me?


	28. Chapter Twenty-Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter makes a few phone calls, Wade dances to Ariana Grande, and May comes to visit.

”You’ve been so distant, Peter, I’m just worried about you, that's all,” Aunt May said over the phone. ”I thought we’d talk. You still haven't told me what happened.”

”I’m sorry, I’ve just been... Preoccupied, May, that's all.” Spider-Man glanced at Wade, who was naked and half-asleep on the bed with him.

”With what, Peter? Have you seen your old friends at all?”

Wade touched his stomach gently, and Peter almost shivered.

”No, May, the Avengers-”

”You need to take care of yourself! Go see your goddamn friends!” May huffed. Wade’s head rested on Spider-Man’s lap, and he ran his hands over his partner’s scarred head.

”The Avengers are my friends. I'm doing fine, I promise. I’m not a kid any more,” he mumbled.

”Do you know how taxes work?” May asked snarkily, and Wade snickered.

”No,” Peter said, frustrated. ”But I thought I died twice in the past two months. Does that count?”

Silence.

”I thought so. Look, I’m doing fine. And it’s not the kind of fine that you say when you want your parents to leave you alone. I really am fine.”

Wade closed their eyes, but stayed silent.

”You’re so different,” May whispered. ”I just want to know what’s been happening in your life. That's all.”

Wade pointed to themself with a small smile, and Peter couldn't help but grin, too.

”Well... I might be seeing someone?” Peter squeaked, and his partner seemed happy.

”Really? Who? Do I know them?” May was excited, and Spidey remembered how much he loved her. ”Is it a girl or a boy?”

”Neither,” Peter replied, and Wade grinned at being gendered correctly. ”You might know of them; their name is Wade.”

”Wade?” He could hear her wrinkling her nose, trying to remember.

”Deadpool,” Peter added nervously.

”The rumors are true, then! Peter, I'm not sure how I feel-”

"May-"

"Don't 'May' me, Peter," she sniffed indignantly. Wade's arms wound tightly around their boyfriend's waist, like they were afraid he would leave. "I'm allowed to have judgements. I would like to know when I can meet them, though."

"Soon," he promised, and, after a pause, they said their goodbyes. Peter hung up and sighed, looking down at his partner.

"I love you," Wade mumbled, quiet.

"I love you, too," Spider-Man frowned. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." Wade shrugged it off.

Peter ran a hand over their scarred head. "May will love you."

"Promise?" Their voice was small.

"Promise."

The phone rang again.

"It's Tony," Peter said, annoyed.

"Lemme answer it!" Deadpool grinned, and Spider-Man passed them the phone.

"Ayy, my least favorite Tin Man! How's it hangin', B?" Pause. "Nah, my boy's here. Don't you worry-" Pause. "I mean, if he wants. We're a motherfucking team, baby." Pause. "You're not his dad! But honey, you know last night I was his Daddy- mmmpf!"

Peter covered Wade's mouth quickly and grabbed the phone.

"Tony! How are you?"

"I'm fantastic, Peter," Tony drawled. "How was your night?"

"Tony!"

"Right, sorry. Anyway, where are you gonna be living, kid? At Wade's or the compound?"

"Uh..." Peter met eyes with his partner.

"I can see you both are very thorough planners. I just wanted to let you know that you're welcome to stay as long as you need, or I could get you set up with an apartment of your own. It's the least I could do, really. And if you need a salary, I could figure something out on that end. Give me a call when you figure things out."

"Wait!" Peter grinned. "I can have my own apartment?"

"Of course, kid."

"Why... Why are you doing this?"

"Ah, don't ask that." Peter could imagine Tony putting his head in his hands.

"Sorry. Thanks so much. I really mean it, Tony."

"Don't thank me, thank Steve and Bucky," Tony said quietly, and hung up.

"Drama queen," Wade yawned after a pause, and Peter pulled them close for a gentle kiss.

"He's just in love," Spider-Man whispered, his lips brushing with theirs.

"God, you're so pretty." Wade took his lip between their teeth, and Peter giggled at how his partner described him. "You like that? You like being called pretty, boy?" Wade flipped them over so that they were on top and Peter was squirming and blushing below them.

"No one's ever called me that," he said shyly, and he felt so small and safe, so he touched Wade's chest.

"Mm... I don't understand how. You are. Jesus fuck, you're gorgeous. Look at you!" They gestured to his figure and sat down on his hips. The friction of that alone was enough for Peter to let out a slight whine.

"Mine," Wade growled, and kissed his neck in that sensitive spot so that he'd squirm even more. "You'd better quit biting that pretty lip of yours, Angel. S' my job."

Peter laughed into another kiss, and then rolled over away from Wade. "I wanna get something done today, babe!" He giggled, kissing his partner on the nose.

"You called me babe!" Wade got off of the bed, picked Peter up, and promptly threw him over their shoulder. Spider-Man blushed when he realized he wasn't wearing anything. "Petey, please. I want you to myself today. Can we have a day off? No hero stuff?"

"Okay," he relented, because that sounded really nice.

"Then put on some clothes!" Wade yelled happily, and set him down in front of their mess of a closet. They stepped behind him and wound their arms tightly around him. "Wear anything you want."

Peter pondered over the diverse pile of clothing as he watched Wade dig for something specific for themself. They grinned widely as they held up a long patterned skirt.

"It's been a while since I've worn this baby!" Wade found some clean underwear and pulled on the skirt. Peter couldn’t help but stare as his partner swished it back and forth.

“Like what you see, cutie?” Wade winked, and Peter blushed and pulled on some jeans and a t-shirt.

After grabbing a quick breakfast, the pair left Wade’s apartment to go house hunting for Spider-Man. It wasn’t too hard, as Peter wanted something small between the Avengers compound and Wade’s apartment. Peter called his aunt once the place was his and asked her to deliver his old clothes to the new address. She was proud of him for the apartment, and even happier when she learned it already came with furniture.

"No IKEA shopping for us!" She had said proudly.

Wade was leaning against the counter, absentmindedly playing with the ruffles in their skirt, and Peter couldn't stop staring at how well they pulled off wearing a skirt. God. They pulled out their phone and started playing a song.

"What?" They asked, smirking. "I wanna dance in your new place, baby!" They stuck their phone in a bowl to make it louder, and skipped over to their boyfriend.

"I've been here all night! I've been here all day! And boy-ah-ah you got me walkin' side to side!" Wade sang and slowed when they came close to Peter, moving their hips teasingly. "I'm comin' at ya, 'cause I know you got a bad reputation..." Peter stared at them, shocked, as they grabbed his hips and moved their own so close, but not quite close enough. Something about the skirt was making his mouth water.

"These friends keep talkin' way too much, say I should give you up! Can't hear them though 'cause I..." Wade sung and danced and twirled around the room far too gracefully for Peter to keep with, but he must've been doing something right, since his partner kept coming back to steal kisses and flirtatiously touch his chest.

"Ah, Wade..." Peter murmured as their hand strayed from his chest. "May is coming over soon, don't go there."

"Sorry, love! Let's go dancing tonight, though, okay? I'll get drunk and you can carry me home!" Peter was surprised that Wade relented so easily, and his chest filled with love for how respectful Wade was of his boundaries.

"Thank you." He pressed another kiss to his partner's scarred lips. "I love you."

"You got me walkin' side to side!" Wade shouted with the music, pointing to their boy. "I love you, too! So much, baby boy."

The song ended, and a knock came on the door. Wade went to shut off their music as Peter answered the door. May gave him a huge hug and sent him to help her with bringing his clothes inside.

"Wade, come meet my Aunt May, and then give me a hand, yeah?" Peter said.

"Sure thing, babe," Wade answered easily, and Peter appreciated them dialing down the pet names. They came over and shook May's hand respectfully, even adding, "You raised a very nice boy, m'am."

Peter watched May's face change from surprise to nerves at Wade's scars. He had honestly forgotten about them, he was so used to them by now. But Spider-Man wanted to yell at her to control her expression.

"Um, hello, Wade. Please call me May. I-I need to use the restroom." She walked off before Peter could tell her directions. Peter saw Wade's expression contort slightly before they straightened it out and took a breath. Spidey hurried over to them and gave them a hug. They squeezed too tightly, but Peter didn't care. He buried his face in their chest and hoped May would collect herself.

After a few moments, she apparently did, as she came striding confidently towards the couple. 

"Wade, I apologize. Peter has never introduced me to a partner before, and I- it's not an excuse," she said, looking them right in the eye. "Tell me how you two met, I'll make tea." She began boiling water. 

Wade and Peter exchanged a look. 

"He's never- I'm the first to be introduced-" Wade began incredulously, but Peter shushed them with an elbow to the ribcage. "Sorry. Mrs. Parker, it's a long story, but I'd love to tell it, with Peter's help, of course." 

The three of them moved to the table with May's tea (she always had tea on her, for just such an occasion) and Wade spoke amiably about the long nights in the Wasteland, with their boyfriend adding in important details. May laughed at all the right jokes, and grew somber when she heard about the group being torn apart. It was a long story, for sure, and by the end, tears had been shed by all, and it was getting late, so May hugged both of them and told them she'd visit soon. Wade pulled Peter into a tight hug after she left, and Peter hadn't felt such comfort and relief for a long time.


	29. Chapter Twenty-Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which... Well, finally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut!
> 
> Also: I added a few paragraphs to the last chapter. Read them and this will make more sense.

Deadpool’s shoulders sagged in relief when they heard May’s car roll away. They collapsed into a chair, looking exhausted. Peter felt his heart plummet at the sight.

"Babe," he whispered, inching closer. "It's okay. She liked you, in the end."

Wade's sigh was low and tired. "It's exhausting, Angel, to have someone stare for so long." They stared at their feet. Peter came closer cautiously, as if he was afraid of scaring the mercenary away.

"Wade," Peter stood directly in front of his partner, wringing his hands with his worry. "I like your scars."

"Stop," Wade murmured, wiping a tear away quickly. They refused to look at him.

"Th-they feel nice when you kiss me."

Wade's head flew up to stare at Peter, who was blushing and worried that he did the wrong thing. He took a step back nervously.

"Angel, I'm not gonna hurt you," Wade's voice came out strangled. "I could never-- please c'mere. Don't back away like that. Please?"

Peter nodded, so Wade held out their arms, and their boyfriend crawled onto their lap to put his head on their chest.

"You're not scared of me, are you, Peter?" Wade's heart was beating fast.

Spider-Man shook his head. He nearly purred when Wade ran a hand through his hair.

"Kiss me," Peter begged, and Wade obliged, their scars feeling rough under his lips. Their tongue flicked over the corner of his mouth.

"You taste so damn good," they murmured, and Peter shivered. "I want you so fucking bad."

"Please," Peter managed before Wade marked his neck, sucking and biting. "I need-"

"Angel," Wade's lips brushed the skin under his ear. "If you're ready, I want to fuck you so bad." Peter moaned. "Ah, not fuck," Wade corrected themself. "I wanna make love to you, baby."

Peter couldn't seem to talk at first. "Please, Daddy-" Wade rolled their hips at that, and Peter let out a whine.

"You're so fucking sexy, Prince," Wade growled, palming him through his pants. "Turned on for me already, damn."

"Ah, please, Wade-"

"Please what?" Wade smirked and kissed his neck again.

"Please, Daddy, I need you-"

Wade pulled his shirt over his head and kissed his stomach. Peter felt gone already, and Wade was in complete control. It satisfied something deep down inside him to be so vulnerable, so trusting of his partner.

"Mine." Wade bit and kissed lower, right under his stomach.

"Yours!" Peter affirmed breathlessly, ridiculously turned on.

"Bed. I'll carry you," Wade added, and picked up their boyfriend in a princess catch and tossed him onto his mattress. Peter whined until Wade's shirt was thrown off of them in haste, and Wade hovered over his body, staring hungrily at him. Peter squirmed until they grabbed his hips roughly.

"Stay still," they ordered, and Peter's dick hurt. He stopped moving and let Wade kiss him all over. "You like it when I tell you what to do, huh?" Wade teased. "Such a good listener. Such a good, pretty boy."

Peter blushed hard, and Wade grabbed his thigh and moved their hand inwards.

"You know what I wanna do?" Wade put their face between Peter's still-clothed legs. "I wanna take these off," they tugged gently at his pants. "I wanna tease you 'till it hurts, and then I wanna fuck you so hard you see stars."

"Please," Peter begged again, and he felt his pants slip off of his body.

Wade's shirt came off quickly, and Peter sighed at the defined abs that were revealed. He just needed to touch...

His partner kissed all over his chest, making his heart flutter and his dick twitch. He groaned when they kissed his inner thighs and pulled off his boxers. Wade was slow enough that he could say no at any time.

"I love you," Peter mumbled, "I love that you are so careful about consent- oh God, Wade, fuck-" They took that moment to take his dick in their mouth. It was so warm and wet and Peter couldn't take it.

He breathed in harshly, and stared at his partner taking in his dick like it was holy. They licked and sucked, and it was only a moment before Peter was feeling himself building. Just before he could release, though, Wade came off of his cock with a pop and grinned at him.

"Wade!" Peter's eyes went wide.

"Shh, I gotcha, it's okay baby, be patient, lemme grab lube and a condom, Angel." Wade left the room in a hurry.

Of course they would bring lube and condoms. Of course.

Peter was on his back, panting, and trying to resist the urge to touch himself, and then Wade was back.

"Take off your skirt, Wade, please?" Peter mumbled when they got closer.

"Alright, Angel," they said gently, and slipped it off along with their boxers. They squirted some lube onto their fingers. "Baby, it might hurt a little at first, but I promise I'll make you feel good after, 'Kay?"

"Okay. I'm ready."

Wade moved Peter over a little and pushed a finger in gently. It burned, and he tensed up.

"Relax, Prince, I got you, I got you, I'd never hurt you for real, yeah? I'mma put a second one in, okay?"

The second finger went in with Peter's nod. It hurt even more. Peter cried out a little, but Wade shushed him gently.

"Baby, it's okay, we can stop whenever you want, but it'll feel good in a minute, yeah? Then you'll forget all about this part. I love you. Shh, Angel." They moved their fingers a little before adding a third. The burn was going away, and Peter realized how turned on he still was.

"Wade, Wade, I want you-"

"I got you, I got you, lemme put the condom on, baby."

And then Peter felt Wade's cock slide inside of him, and their body was pressed against his, and it was so much. They moved and it was even more. He felt so full and aroused.

And then they hit the spot just right and Peter moaned.

"Fuck!"

"Found it." Wade's voice made Peter's chest hurt, it was so full of love.

"Please, Daddy, more, do that again!"

And then Wade was fucking him, and making obscene noises, and he was falling apart beneath them. He couldn't feel any of the pain any more, it was just pleasure, and Wade.

They kindly pumped his cock a few times, letting him cum quickly. Wade came soon after, growling, "Mine."

Afterwards, Wade dragged a warm washcloth over Peter's body, and Peter preened under the attention. He snuggled happily under Wade's arm and became lulled towards sleep by their heartbeat and breathing.

"Baby," Wade whispered as Peter was drifting off. "I'm so in love with you, I don't know what to do with myself."

Peter yawned. "Hold me closer," he supplied.

And so they did, and Peter fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter will be epilogue-esque. Thanks for sticking with my infrequent updates!


	30. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The End.

A month later, Peter asked Wade to live with him, and Wade swears they didn’t cry excited tears. 

Two months later, Wade took Peter to the graveyard where Vanessa was buried. 

For Halloween, Wade was Captain America and Peter was Tony Stark, but not Iron Man. 

Christmas came and went, and Peter bought Wade a new speaker. Wade got Peter fuzzy socks and a long-haired kitten they named Gretchen, to honor Mean Girls, Wade had explained. Her hair was big because it was full of secrets. Aunt May bought gifts for both of them, pet supplies, a mexican cookbook, and, to everyone's surprise, a yellow sundress for Wade. 

At New Year's, the Avengers had a party and Wade and Peter shared a sweet, champagne-tasting kiss at midnight. It had been a year, Peter thought. Full of good and bad and he was grateful for all of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading!!! I'm thinking about a new story, but it's so hard to update bc I'm so damn busy. Love you all


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